May 9th, 2012
04:54 PM ET
Against Me!'s Tom Gabel speaks on being transgenderIn an interview with Rolling Stone, Against Me! singer Tom Gabel speaks out on being transgender, and shares her plans to transition from a man to a woman. The punk rocker has been privately struggling with gender dysphoria, and will soon start taking hormones and receiving electrolysis treatments, Rolling Stone reports. Gabel is the highest profile musician to ever come out as transgender, although not the first overall, as MTV notes, and she tells Rolling Stone that's precisely the reason she's publicly sharing her story.
Prior to talking to Rolling Stone, Gabel had only revealed her plans to transition to "a handful" of family members and friends. "I'm going to have embarrassing moments," Gabel tells Rolling Stone in an issue that arrives on newsstands Friday. "And that won't be fun. But that's part of what talking to you is about - is hoping people will understand, and hoping they'll be fairly kind." The scariest part of the process, Gabel says, was anticipating how her wife Heather would react. "But she's been super-amazing and understanding," the musician, who plans to eventually take the name Laura Jane Grace, tells the mag. The couple, who have a young daughter, intend to stay married. A rep for the band tells CNN that Gabel isn't issuing a statement at this time.
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I love the part where gender is apparently all just a state of mind, but he needs electrolysis and hormone treatment and a feminine name. This is a crazy person. Why are we calling a man "her and she?" Would this be different if he claimed to be a Pacific Islander trapped in the body of a white person? Is that crazy? How about if Napoleon was trapped in there, and he demanded to be referred to as such dressed accordingly? What if he claims that he was actually born an earthworm and needs to be surgically transformed? Where do you draw the line of sanity and social acceptance? You can't be a woman if you weren't born one, that's kind of the way it goes.
So if a woman can't have a period she isn't female? I know a few whom can't and they were born female. So elderly women aren't female, nor are ones who have had an operation to remove their organs for whatever reason?
Idiots!
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WOW.....life sure has changed since my parents met and are still happily together. Now we have a bunch of freaks....take Cher's son/daughter and now this....what's next? I should have my boobs tied to my behind because it makes me feel more natural????
No, you should go to hell.... as that is obviously where you naturally belong you bigoted P.O.S. And FYI I'm one of those freaks you're talking about.
Gabel is now and has been a transgender? And this is a surprise?
If he could have his body cloned as a woman and move his brain into it, that would be one thing, but being chopped and trimmed to resemble a girl doesn't give you a womb and ovaries and the menstrual cycle. He will lose more than she gains, if you know what I mean.
Women ebb and flow with the tides; they rise and set with the moon, they are connected to Mystery in a way men can never know. Ginks aren't women.
he's a nobody, who cares?
They're lame, and who cares.
listen..... just because lady gaga says gay is ok, doesnt make it true.
Oh but because you said it isn't, it isn't? Go tell someone who cares, dipsh**.
He is going to be such a cute girl!!
I am not trying to be rude or insensitive, I just truly do not understand this. I don't understand how someone could feel like they are the wrong gender. Is it because they do not feel comfortable as a male and the only other option is being a female (and vice versa)? How do you know you'd feel better as the opposite gender? I think part of my concern is what the individual looking to go through the gender reassignment process expects the other gender to be like. What if it's not what they are expecting and it doesn't fix whatever the issue is? Again, I am not trying to be hateful or anything like that, I am genuinely ignorant about this and these are honest questions.
I feel the same way, I don't exactly understand it either, but more from a psychological sense. My thoughts on it stem from questions about gender roles. What is it about a female that makes someone a female and a male that makes someone a male? I mean if this is purely a reproductive organ difference than that sort of defeats my question, but is it the roles in society that men and women have that define us by gender? It's a really interesting topic, I don't think there's a clear-cut answer for it, but then again, I'm not a psychologist.
I'm with 'librababy' on this. I just don't get it. I'm not in favor of it one way or the other. I couldn't care less what a person wants to do with their gender assignment, but I just don't get it. I don't get completely flipping your life upside down, risking the loss of family and friends and for what? IDK...
Thanks for asking questions rather than spewing judgment and hate. As with most things I don't particulary partake in (like eating 3 hamburgers in one meal, being loud, understanding math) I just don't understand. Sadly for humans it seems that they HAVE to understand something to be accepting. My best friend began transitioning from male to female two years ago. Although she has been my best friend for four years, gender dysmorphia still perplexes me. I don't understand it because I am not going through it. As a freind and supporter though I can witness her struggles, her true feelings, and the way she carries herself(all which are very feminine even before she decided to transition).
A lot of times all it takes is meeting a trans person and most times you won't even know the person is trans, so you might already have, to be more "understanding". But until then it should be about being openminded. Hopefully one day humans don't need to fully understand something to let people live their lives as long as nobody is being hurt.
Live and Let Live.
Thats gonna be one ugleeee chick. And those tattoos are hardly lady like. Maybe a nice goth heuer 😉
What God doesn't give to you, you have to go and get it for yourself.
I am curious whether and/or how this will affect vocal characteristics, once the hormones kick in. As a performer in the public eye, these changes will of course be visible and possibly audible to the fans, so it's a good idea to let them know. After that, it's really nobody's business. That said, any performer may choose to play up or down to the crowd, and who knows – it may become a focal point of the act, if the performer so chooses.
Plenty of more famous performers flirt with gender boundaries, so this really isn't new to the music biz. It would be major news though if this were, say, a country western star. Until then, it's just a publicity generator. Gender disphoria is not something a person would choose to experience, but may at least choose to live in the gender that the brain has attached itself to if that will make the person's life more comfortable. Musicians have the professional hazard of being judged primarily on performance, and secondarily on appearance, so really, if this does not degrade the music, and possibly even improves it, then the appearance is something that can be adjusted through the miracle of Hollywood. I'm sure Cher would be willing to share a few outfits if that's what this performer wants to do, otherwise, not much else changes.
It won't affect the vocal cords since he has already gone thru puberty. With that said voice training can do quite a bit to give him, soon to be her, a more female sound. With him being a singer voice training shouldn't be something new or too difficult.
As the mother of a transgender daughter, I realize how ignorant so many of you are of this condition. This is an internal struggle, that has ultimately killed many people who couldn't live with it and so committed suicide rather than choose to live life in the gender they were most comfortable in.
My daughter did recently have surgery to remove her obvious male parts. Not all, and, actually, a minority of transgender people end up going this far. For many, it's because it isn't financially feasible. For women to men, it is often because the surgery is far from ideal. It is much better for male to female transgenders.
Pronouns are a difficult issue for anyone who is acquainted with a transgender person. I hope that the reporter asked the subject which gender pronoun he would prefer at this point and went with she because, of course, that's who he is.
All we have in the English language is he, she, and it, and I think everyone would agree that it is simply not an appropriate pronoun for a person.
What I hear in these comments is a lot of misunderstanding and fear of the unusual. That's too bad. All people deserve to try to find happiness in their lives and this person's determination to live as the gender she feels doesn't affect anyone other than her immediate family and some friends. The fact that she has decided to go public is a courageous act that no transgender would do for notoriety as some here have suggested.
i couldnt have said it better. i wish more people thought like you. i feel the same way...if it doesnt affect you, why do you (meaning everyone else) care?
Hey everyone, I'm a horse but I believe I'm a unicorn. If I have a horn glued to my head does that make me a real unicorn?
Yes. You are a unicorn. However, as a trans-species unicorn you run the risk of intolerant jerk unicorns becoming abusive because they don't understand what it's like to be born a unicorn in a non-unicorn body. And it's not like there are any special powers conferred when changing. You won't have many of the unicorn powers, like crapping rainbows, but at least you will finally feel comfortable, and your real friends will still love and respect you.
Yes. You are a unicorn. However, as a trans-species unicorn you run the risk of intolerant jerk unicorns becoming abusive because they don't understand what it's like to be born a unicorn in a non-unicorn body. And it's not like there are any special powers conferred when changing. You won't have many of the unicorn powers, like krapping rainbows, but at least you will finally feel comfortable, and your real friends will still love and respect you.
No, not a unicorn, but I assure you, you will still be an uneducated low breed. 🙂
Nope, you'd just LOOK like a unicorn. Other unicorns might wink and say "You can be a unicorn, buddy," but your horn will always be plastic.
If I have surgery to look like a fish, that doesn't mean that I have become a fish.
Frank, you miss the point. It isn't about appearance. This person genuinely believes she was born in the wrong-gendered body. Sometimes people are born with birth defects, genetic disorders, drug addiction, immune deficiencies, tiny johnsons, etc. and they're permitted to fix the problem through medical intervention at any point in their lives. Why can't someone born with a body that doesn't match the brain's wiring for gender also remediate? It's not like they're hurting anyone else, and what's in people's pants is nobody else's business.
Why do they keep saying "her" and "she"? He pretty much looks like a dude and has the same equipmnt as a dude.
s/he will come out of this a grotesque tatted-up, scarred-up, confused freak of science gone wrong. just because we can do something doesn't mean we should. and this isn't hatred, I don't hate the guy, I just think he's making a huge mistake.
People thought I was making a huge mistake as well, until they realised how much happier I am now, and it's about as clear as a clear blue sky.
This is one hell of a publicity stunt from an unheard of band. He is trying to sell some albums and won't go through with it. Until Tom has the surgery he isn't a she. After still not a she. I wish the dude the best.
Kudos to the writer of this article for using the person's real gender, rather than using words like "he" or "his". It showed a lot of respect for the individual being interviewed.
Funny, I was thinking exactly the opposite. I'm as progressive as they come but calling TOM Gabel a she at this point is a bit premature. Physically he is still male and still uses a male name. The writer was presumptuous. Call him a she after he gets snipped and picks out a girl's name.
Can I have access to his groupies then?
They are not Punk, nor is he a punk rocker
Seems like a handsome man. He'll probably make a fugly woman
Grammatically speaking, Tom is male so all language must be in masculine terms, e.g., he, his. When journalists, or those posing as one, impart their own personal bias, their work loses it objectivity and purpose,
The reporter is correct and being a professional. You always refer to a person as the gender they identify with.
Against Me! has released some of the greatest music in the last decade. Instead of spouting anger about something you have only opinions about, grab a sixer, turn on Reinventing Axel Rose, and relax; great album.
Yeah, they're right up there with Bob Dylan, The Beatles and The Stones..LOL !!
I checked it out, it sucked
most of the negative comments come from miserable, ethically bankrupt idiots who can't relate to others.
I'm surprised at all the bigotry in this comment section, but maybe I shouldn't be... :/
Holy Crap! It's Mrs. Garrison!
Oh Jeethus, Jeethus Cristh!
All the best to Laura, her wife and their daughter during this transition because it must not be easy to transition so drastically in ones own lifespan. For all of you guys out there being bigotted just think about the paradigm of Thomas Kuhn's Scientific Revolution in that subjective supposed objective science changes throghout time man. Meaning that complacent ideas like a nature is a joke needing to be changed in each subsequent generation. Such logic like born certain x =x is justifying opression and hatred to your fellow man and in general mankind. For example, I'm blind with LHON (lebers) but by your logic that scientist shouldn't find a cure for blindness because a God myth (see Richard Dawking's God Dillusion) wouldn't want me to have stem cell, gene therapy, optic nerve replacement, robotic enhancements, etc. Get real foks the person makes up the decision not overalll society and by such a person is a controler in part of their own destiny not you nor I.
Your post is the biggest pile of manure in the history of claptrap.
save your money...read the bible
you must have an IQ of a toilet bowl
I did, I really enjoy the parts about loving your neighbor and not judging others.
no, if you want a good storybook – read the cat in the hat
What a hateful and judgemental country we live in....You people are what is disgusting!!! So fricking sorry everybody is not like you. Worthless haters and hypocrites!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Palmer_%28musician%29#Gender_Transition
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keith_Caputo#Personal_life
Why is the article referring to Tom as 'her'. HIS chromosomes are XY – he's is a guy! Period.
Unless he can start having a period!
Gross
Romney vs. Frankenstein (Obama)
Put simply, better the devil you don't know. Vote Romney.
"Put simply".
There was nothing simple about your post....other than it's author.
Vote for Romney...you christian/conservative/facist/republican/mouth-breahter.
What's that got to do with the article you freakin POS
From Against Me!'s song Ocean: "And if I could have chosen, I would have been born a woman. My mother once told me she would have named me Laura."
Its none of my business,and its no one elses business either.
I dont care until I hear bigots and Idiots condemning how others choose to live,and then Ill defend them,as Id hope they would defend me when busybody christians tell me I shouldnt smoke marijuana or listen to rock music.
Wow, what some people will do to sell an album.
You can't be serious? With all the idiots out there? You think this well help him sell an album. You think he will wantto be subjected to the mass, Christian majority stoning him to sell an album. If anything, this will hurt sales as the crazies take out their tractors and run over his records. Get real. I think he is hoping yo help one kid somewhere who is struggling thinking he/she is alone.
@Zerix – that's all that matters. your opinion meaans nothing to me, but I think you know that already. CNN got what they wanted with this story, more comments
.
You can put lipstick on a pig
I think it may just be a publicity stunt to get their band noticed. If you want to remove your pen!s, go ahead. I'll keep mine, thanks. My wife is rather fond of it.
Nobody cares. Well, maybe you and your wife.
Probably not. They have been around for 15 years maybe.
Dibs on the left over weindog haha
I like boobs too, but I don't need a pair of my own..
This is gross. Theres nothing more artifical than some dude saying he's emotional distraut so he should be a woman.
Props to the wife for sticking with her spouse, showing that love knows no gender. (And no, she's not staying with her spouse because of the money; she could easily get that in a divorce settlement instead.)
Dx2718 – I agree with you, his/her wife is inspiring. Your comment about divorce settlement makes me think you're hungry for money but whatever.
I am an independent who's leaning conservative, and I support his/her decision. A few years ago I met a lady who worked as an airline pilot (!) who used to be a man, very nice lady (although I found her unusually tall :).
Anyways later I heard from numerous sources that she used to be a very mean and angry he. After the transition she became at peace with herself. So more power to her. No one takes such a decision easily, you must be tormented inside to want to go through with a gender change...
She is still in shock. It wil hit her when she realizes that he/she will be getting nailed by a dude and she will need to find side action to stay satisfied. Not a marriage anymore. She should bounce. Maybe she's waiting for their new record deal to blow up and get PAID that cash money. I'd stick around for that.
P.S. I love Against Me! Transgender or not!
Dear Tom=Evil,
You may have grown up without a father figure, but there are plenty of people who grew up without a mother, and having 2 is wonderful. My mother is gay, so I should know. Everyone grows up with difficulties in their lives, whether it be not having a father, having a gay mother, or having a transgender parent, etc. But that makes that person the strong being that they are. Does that mean my mother needed to deny her love for the sake of my sister and I? No. Now I have 2 wonderful mothers to guide me. And I wish the same to Tom/Laura's daughter.
Happy Mother's Day to my moms, all mothers, and especially Laura. 🙂
I know. But I'm just saying it was a bit negligent for him to make this decision after the fact. All everyone really wants is for their children to have an easy life and I was just pointing out that having a father and mother figure is easier than having one, none or two of the same (mother mother etc).
How typical of CNN. For years they preach the slogan "We happy with you are" , run half of dozen specials on the legitimate travesty of genital mutilization and the pyschological damage which ensues, then applaud people who mutilate their genitals.
That should read: "Be happy with who you are" but in CNN's case, I suppose either applies.
Exactly – it's important to be happy with who you are. Who you are, however, is not your outside appearance. Who you are is that voice in your head. This is his way of telling everyone who he is on the inside, and changing his outside shell to match who he really is. This IS him being happy with who he is.
Highest profile musician? I have no idea who this is.
I have serious issues with the fact that this dude calls himself a punk-rocker and picked the name Laura Jane Grace.
Nothing punk rock about that at all...
Funny how CNN is already calling him "she", though everything about him is still male. Agenda much?
So it's YOUR agenda that decides what CNN should report? Funny, I would think it's the person in question who should decide whether they should be referred to as Mr. or Ms.
It's a little concept called "respect". It's something like a combination of "consideration", "sensitivity" and "politeness." Perhaps all four concepts are unknown to you.
The protocol is to refer to someone with the gender pronoun that matches the gender they identify with. As soon as someone admits to being transgender, even before they do anything about it, the polite thing is to switch gender pronouns immediately. The person identifies as a woman, so we refer to her as "she" even if she is biologically male.
Every single news media outlet, including MTV, is saying "she" and "her" in their coverage of the story, not just CNN.
What a person wants to do with their own body is their business.
But, it is a joke that this person thinks that he will actually be a female. He will no more be a female than putting horns on my head makes me a bull. A female has XX chromosomes. Until all of HIS XY chromosomes are replaced with a woman's, he is a male. No amount of drugs or mutilation can change that.
Too bad you forgot about brain structure and how it affects gender.
Just out of curiousity, what about a person who is XXY or XYY?
You obviously know very little about biology. About 1 in 100 people who are "men" actually have XX chromosomes. They grew into men during pregnancy anyway - it happens sometimes - but they are not XY and never will be. The chromosomes are simply not always the decider of what gender a fertilized egg ends up being.
Your ignorance is the real joke here.
Spoken like a true troglodyte.
Actually, TomAmerican, studies have shown that lots of transgender folks are the way they are because they have an extra chromosome. So, they are indeed confused for a reason. It's a bit more complicated than the zealots would like you to believe.
They should call you Doctor TomAmerican
WP that's misinformed gibberish. de LaChapell's syndrome is XX but the extra "X" has the male component ON IT. It is a rare crossover issue during meiosis. People with de LaChapell's have male characteristics but have all sorts of issues.
Transgender logic: if I microwave a banana then logically after the process it becomes an apple.
or a pile of burnt banana crud.
Wow, I can't believe how selfish people can be. Tom is a disgusting human being for even considering putting his daughter through this. I grew up without a father. He's still alive although I haven't even talked to him since I was three. What Tom is doing isn't much better. It will be like having a step
mom in her house. She will NEVER have a father figure now unless this deadbeat hits the road. After the hormones go in he won't even have the capacity to be a father figure, just a second, less competent mother. This poor girl is going to go through school wondering why she doesn't have a dad. Wondering why she doesn't get taken to places where dads take their children (I wouldn't know where but I'm assuming that it incorporates necessary one on one bonding). She'll have to have therapy. She may react violently (the was I did) and it will take years to straighten her out. Yes, Tom, do whatever you like. Deprive your daughter of her father. People like Tom (who leave their children without either necessary parental persons i.e. father or mother) should be jailed and should pay thousands of dollars in resti.tutions.
If his children need therapy it will be because of ignorant people like you, not because his parents decide to be true to themselves and love each other through it all.
Your post does nothing but fuel hate and misunderstanding. Try and have a little compassion.
I'm sorry, did you have an absent father during childhood? In that case, you don't know what the damages are. I think it's YOU WHO NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND that I KNOW from PERSONAL EXPERIENCE that this child will have problems growing up if she doesn't have both a father and mother in her household.
Three cheers for selfish Tom for making the world a worse place.
Please quit making pointless posts that exude YOUR bitterness about your own life.
Get some class.
Thanks for projecting your own unresolved father issues onto the situation at hand. You need more therapy; much more. Hundreds of hours and thousands of dollars more. And maybe fiddle with your dosage, because it doesn't appear to be working.
Ummmm...get over it.
Ha, I really have to laugh at you ignorant imbeciles. You really think sharing my story was for me?!!? Do you know how hurtful it is to even think of? I'm sharing the story to show everyone that Tom is being selfish for deciding this AFTER the birth of his daughter (especially if he was contemplating this for sometime). Now I shall lose my temper for you uneducated simpleton without two brain cells to rub together.
@Michael5472
F*** you. Okay? Just go f***ing die you worthless piece of inferior s***. You complain of all these bigots being unaccepting of people and where are you? Throwing petty insults at someone who NEVER said he didn't think that transgendered people are okay or normal or whatever. You know what I f***ing said?!!? I f***ing said he was selfish for putting his daughter through this and I shared my story as an example. And what do you do? You just go f***ing trolling. F***ing trolling like the f***ing right wing Christians do. And why? Because you're a f***ing p.r.i.c.k. I hope you have fun living in your f***ing dumpster for the rest of your life now because now that I have written down about 7 profanities I feel less angry about you negligence, idiocy, rudeness and overall incompetence.
Uh okay..I dont really see what the deal is..I mean..its his/her body..So to each its own. I could never do it..I love my massive fourteen incher..The ladies love it too. Especially when Im pounding it deep..Then my woman tamer is going after her anally..Thats rite..I do it all..the orig og playa from the himalayas..
The larger ever confirmed pe.nis was thirteen inches. If yours was that big you would've had it measured and would've held a world record or longest pen.is ever. Typical male over-exaggeration.
That is so funny I almost pee'd on myself.
Hope he donates is soon to be gone organ to a worthwhile person who wants one.
It really sucks to not have legs if you really wanted to be able to walk, sometimes people can do something about it though, while i can't speak for someone who is missing legs, because i don't know what that's like, i can definitely say that i do know how much it sucks to have a body of the opposite gender, and if you don't know what's that like, i dont think the unnecessary criticism is really fair.
You cannot be stuck in another's body. MY WORDS ARE FINAL. You and your kind (the poor individuals plagued by mental disease and instability) think you can defy nature. Too bad it's all in your head and there aren't any scientists brave enough to do studies and create cures to prevent genital mutilation.
Right on Ronald. these people have crazy mental problems. Some people hear voices and we put them on lithium. Others want to be a woman and we cut off their weiners.
The best of luck I hope you and your family get through this well and happy.
As a fan of the band, this is some shocking/weird news. and I'm pretty sure this story is bigger then the band ever was. But anyways, in the end he will make the final decision, and it's his life.
I'm sorry to hear that this person intends to mutilate his genitals and take hormones that his body is not supposed to have in it.
I'm sorry to hear that your are to close minded and selfish to realize the pain and suffering another human being is going through being born into a body they don't feel comfortable in.
You are not born into a body. You are born as a body. Perhaps you should have just a minor understanding of science before debating. The body which this Tom fellow was "born in" is not a prison or cage but it actually is him...
lighten up, Jello. clearly sometimes the brain chemistry of a body clashes with the particular 'mechanics' of the gender of the body. "born into" is just a simplification.
An incorrect simplification at that 😀
Funny how other mental disorders are met with drugs and therapy. It is not normal to be born a man but be transformed into a woman surgically (or vice versa). What if i want to be another ethnicity? Can I get black skin and an Afro to treat my ethnic dysphoria? Maybe species dysphoria? Can I become a goat if I want to? Sure, but it is weird as hell and most people will think that you are a weirdo for it. I know that it is a mental disease, but the treatment for this is pretty severe.
I'm saddened and amazed by the negative responses I've seen.
I'm a military wife, mother, and product of a VERY southern religious upbringing, yet how can I find this acceptable and worthy of the praise it is due, for Tom to make this step to become Laura, but so many others cannot comprehend the importance of this?
How does this affect you? Here is a human being taking a risk that can totally drop their house of cards, but you guys are here judging? Let's post your porn history while making negative accusations, shall we?
I've watched news feeds all day hoping for support for Tom/Laura, and I've been sorely disappointed with the asinine comments I've seen.
Personally, I not only wish Laura the best, but I wish it to you folks, as well. I hope you understand what loving thy neighbor as thyself truly means.
Until you quit making ugly remarks? Not gonna happen.
I wish Laura / Tom the best. Thank you for coming out and helping others like you to realize they are not alone.
All the best Laura. P.S (welcome to the club of chick flicks : )
Amen.
That's how we roll bayougirl. We judge. We judge like crazy. Laura will be walking among us someday just like reptile man and leopard boy. When you change yurself into a woman from a man you are setting yourself up for stares, jeers, whatever. It's not right, but it is what happens. A chick that looks likea dude will always get a second look, and a question to your buddy "is that a dude?". Just the way it works. If we didn't care, then Tom wouldn't care if he was Laura or not.
I knew a coworker who to my surprise came out one day and said he was going to be a woman. Didn't make sense to me but the best way I found to deal with it was to just ignore it. I didn't want to popularize it or give any special attention to it in any way.
Just ignoring something–what a compassionate, logical, evolved and helpful way to approach a complex situation. What a friend you must be! Here's hoping you can also eventually ignore cancer, incipient alzheimers, hip replacements, drug and/or alcohol abuse, and a variety of mental illnesses, which either you, your loved ones, or colleagues will all have to deal with at some point. But go on–ignore it. Wear that badge of ignorance loudly and proudly! Perhaps you will also successfully ignore the oncoming truck on a wet, slippery road at midnight instead of actually doing something about it. Good luck!
Good for you Laura! Don't listen to idiots with opinions, the only opinion that matters is yours.
O someone that cuts themselves because they want to hide the other pain in there life should just listen to themselves and keep cutting? Or should they listen to what there mind is really telling them that they need help?
Wow. Some real ignorant people like to sound off on here. Did somebody just reference this person's transformation to that of their stupid dog wanting to be a frog because it prefer croaking to barking? Calling it a mental illness? I think a failure to recognize and see outside your short sighted prejudices is more of an illness...
This story would make more sense if his wife decided she was a man.
changing into a woman...that is so gay....er....wait, staying with your wife is....or does he still like chicks? i am so confused....i am gonna transform into a smarter person.
after having transformed, i now see that he has battled his womanhood through marriage and conception of a daughter. yes, he is a she...because that just makes scientific sense.
You ought to read Italo Calvino..."Cosmicomics". It might suit your sensibility.
blurb – Enchanting stories about the evolution of the universe.
There is lots of transformation.
Whatever (s)he wants to do is fine. but there is nothing punk about that band. they are horrible.
Finally , someone says something intelligent !
She???? What a joke. By enabling these people society is doing them more harm than good, If we stopped pretending this is somehow normal maybe more people would be treated for the menal illness this is instead of mutilating thier bodies and poisoning themselves with artifical hormones.
I could not agree more
I agree so much with you that my agreement is the power of both your agreement and that of scott's combined then multiplied 10000 fold. But really, these people do make me literally noxious. HE has a p.e.n.i.s. and as such, HE will FOREVER be a MAN. Just because someone cuts off their pen.is and takes a few steroids doesn't mean they're a girl.
gender is defined more by chemistry in the brain than by the particular mechanical pieces. how about some education and compassion for people, sheesh?
What about his Y chromosome????? Oh yeah, I guess he can still be a girl with that.
Spellcheck much?
Your antiquated reasoning might be more amusing if your mistakes didn't expose you for the horse's patoot you clearly are.
I guess that means his/her wife is gay now?
Accepting gay people is one thing, but I will forever think individuals that want to be a different gender have a mental disorder. Of course our society celebrates it because many of us are deathly afraid of being called a bigot. In the end, that fear shows just of selfish our society has become.
gender is not about whats on the outside, it's what you identify yourself as. So imagine struggling your whole life in a male body, feeling something is very wrong. Of course your first instinct is to ignore it, or even find some means of help against it. But ultimately, no matter what you do, you still feel this feeling like you aren't what your supposed to be. How can you simply sweep something like that under the rug? You can't. Educate yourself more on the subject before you make subjective judgements.
You think tolerance & acceptance = fear ?
How would you know – you don't seem to have any tolerance and acceptance in yourself ?
So it is not a case of "till death do us apart or you turn into a woman whichever comes first" ;-). Come to think of it there are more serious issues in this world like this one for example than whether gay people should be allowed marriage and civil unions.
Publicity stunt. Pulled one over on Rolling Stone and MTV! Now THAT'S punk rock!
So...I have no idea how a transgenders mind works but...his wife staying with him?!?!?! She could support him, but I would not stayed married to man that is becoming a woman. Because I do not want to be married to a women. I wonder if a man would stay married to a woman that became a man...my guess is no.
I know someone who stayed with a man who declared himself a woman. I think many people feel obligated to stay with someone they already made a commitment to.
If they love each other, I guess that's all that matters. 🙂
If someone changes genders (even though a man is always a man and a woman a woman)... Let me rephrase that.. If a man THINKS he is changing his gender by cutting off his p.en.is then I strongly believe that voids the marriage and is an excellent reason for divorce. It's the same as if my best friend changed his gender I would cut all ties with him and most likely never speak to him again.
Good for her – and all best wishes too!
JESUS!!!
Well I don't agree with a lot of the hate shown here in the comments, but I also think people should accept themselves as their bodies are made.. not try to change it into some image they have in their minds.
I respect her opinion to become a woman, but seriously, that's gonna be one ugly chic! I mean, he's a handsome dude, but as a woman... not seeing it.
God made him a lesbian?
He needs theiripy! Gatcho bad!
Leaving all the subjective based gender switching decisions aside, you can't change your DNA. You are always a man or a woman depending on your chromosome count. Just saying – chop it off but you are still always going to be who you were from the womb.
The nuances of DNA are substantially more than just "Male" and "Female" the for example Olympics no longer performs gender tests because the line is so blurred. Gender is a spectrum.
Gender is not determined exclusively by the chromosomes. It's also a matter of personal perception and societal and cultural perceptions. Further, your point fails to account for those individuals who's chromosomes are ambiguous as to gender, but who nonetheless identify as a gender.
Up next, the FREEEEEEAK SHOOOOOOW!
Starring close-minded bigots LIKE YOU!!!!
I just can't imagine what this poor soul is going through..I bet this is the hardest decision he has ever had to make..He probably had to take into consideration his daughter and all his families feelings. I feel for him and all envolved ..My prayers are with him..
That's punk rock!
hate to tell you tom, but the ridicule is not going to be the most painful part. pen!s removal may hurt just a bit more. just sayin... personally i don't care what you do.
I think people should be happy of how God created them. His daughter is going to need heavy theripy. But the only person who will love him forever is God
Um, I agree about probably needing therapy. However, its every individual's right to do as they please to their own body. And by the way, therapy is not spelled with an "i". Just sayin'. God didn't teach you that?
That's just an excuse to defy GOD. I bet you justify the things you do against God everyday which is why you think this way.
i actually agree with you on this one, but for the love of god learn to spell. it's THERAPY.
Jennifer hunter said, "I think people should be happy of how God created them."
Jennifer, God created Gabel with a woman's mind in a man's body. This is nothing new. There are accounts of such phenomena going back centuries in multiple cultures. Gabel is transitioning fully into what God planted in her brain. You should be happy for her. I'm sure the whole family will get counselling, and the child will be fine. This has happened many times before, and health-care professionals know how to deal with it. I'm sure your prayers and good thougths will be appreciated.
That's therapy with an 'a'. God will love HER just the same.
Walter so you're sayings god made this woman in a mans body but "she" doesn't like men? So god made a lesbian in a mans body? I think this punk rocker has taken a few to many drugs..
God made a man in a man's body. This whole gender mixup is garbage. It is clearly a mental disorder/disease that needs serious treatment.
I knew Tom Gabel. We got into a fist fight over 20 dollars. He treated me like garbage. And while I support LGBT community I DID have a laugh. You people jumping up in defense of this guy have no idea how HE/HER treated others before becoming "successful." You do it to feel better about yourselves. Good luck dude! Or dudette...?
gonna have to check the box that says "other"
I don't disagree with the idea that this guy would like to become a woman and he did not choose to feel that way.
However you have to deal with the deck of cards you are dealt with. You were born a DUDE not a chick. If you are born tall you don't chop yourself off at the knees and if you were born european but would rather be african you don't bust out a bucket of paint. You have to work within the guidelines.
What happens if I decide I really want to screw goats? Should I be able to? What about people who are born feeling they need to be able to molest children? What about them?
Changing gender doesn't harm anyone. People should be allowed to be who ever they want to be, as long as that doesn't infringe upon the rights of others Where as goat screwing is animal abuse. Child molestation should be punishable by public castration.
m00nsuit, why do you compare gender reassignment with child molestation? Why do you care if this person reassigns their gender? If you want to make such comments, maybe you should spend some time with a transgendered person to find out what their life is like first? I myself do not know, but I am not so quick to judge as you.
Also your statement " You have to work within the guidelines"... What exactly are these guidelines and where can the rest of us read them? You might be able to save the whole planet if you share them.
PS... There are laws in place against bestiality and child molestation. If you are having those thoughts, turn yourself in now before you act.
It's a simple question of consent, m00nsuit. A goat cannot consent, a child cannot consent. In this case, one adult is making a decision which affects only him/herself – though it can certainly be argued that others will be indirectly affected.
Don't do that to goats!! . Sheep are much nicer ..
How the hell do banging goats and changing your gender have anything to do with eachother? On the one hand, you're physically harming goats, on the other, you're being true to yourself so that you can be a happier person. Your simple-mindedness is baffling.
How you got so much stupid in such a small space is really impressive!
It's sad to read some of the comments here. You feel bad for his daughter? He should be what he was born to be? First off, Tom grew up an anarchist and punk so your opinion hasn't meant much to him for a long time and probably never will. I subscribe to a number of punk sites and it's amazing the outpouring of support that community is giving him. A shame the rest of society can't catch up.
Second, unlike everyone (I'm speculating) who is commenting, I had the privilege of meeting Tom at a show in NYC on March 30. He is a friend of a friend and they set up the meeting. I was amazed how down to earth he was and how easy he was to talk to. I had in my mind an angry, hostile person and what I found was someone who cared about me and my family. We talked about his daughter, my 4 year old son and the love we both have for our kids. He took a week off from a tour so he could go home and spend a week with his wife and daughter. Don't feel bad for them- that's a hell of a lot more attention than many of us give our families. At the end of the day, he can go through this change, but the heart and soul remain the same. His are as good as they come. I applaud his courage and wish him well.
You mean she is a friend of a friend?
We don't really care to know Tommy or Toni or whatever. Just stay away from our kids.
Now go away and strap on some silly plastic organ and have your perverse fun
You are just another of Mother Nature's Little Mistakes. WE don't GAF.
Jesus was a transgender.
Who is "we" and "our" cuz you sure ain't speaking for me. I don't want you around my children either.
I've always felt like I was a cash register born into a humans body. My neighbor has always felt he should have been a radio speaker.We're both searching for the right specialist to make us into what we were born to be.Fingers crossed.
Does mocking her make you feel more of a person? Does it make you feel secure? Does it do anything other than make you look pathetic?
It shows people how disgusting, perverse and just wrong transgendered people are.
born with penis. xy chromosomes. has developed, descended testes that produce ample testosterone. can only mate with female to procreate. despite what the dsm tries to say about transgendered status, he is a dude. sorry to rain on the hero's parade. feel bad for his daughter.
Let's see a picture of the junk, I don't believe this bs.
@Dave, below. Your comment is so pathetically hopeless. I breathe for all those around you who cannot, as you've sucked all the air from the room.
@maty
Strange that you would single my comment out amongst all the rather hateful comments on here, I've said nothing mean about Tom, I've just stated an opinion, and even wished him well. So don't "breath" for anyone, they don't need your help, at least most people on here have opinions, not just pathetic dramatized shots at others.
Thank you for your honesty, many families like mine have transgender children who are incredible people living normal lives. I look forward to the time that being transgender will not raise eyebrows and public people like you will help this process along. I wish you strength and continued success.
Why do people say he's mentally I'll when the same isn't said about people who get breast implants or butt implants...your brain, not your body determines who you are and science has shown that the wiring in "female" brains are different than in "male" brains. It isn't impossible to imagine a mis- match happening. Also this isn't a new thing. Transcended people have been around in many cultures for hundreds of years.
Watch the movie "Normal," with Jessica Lange. A powerful film about this topic. Everyone should see it.
Why don't stupid people like this figure this stuff out before they drag innocent people through this?
Yeah the wife is going to stay with him. How would it look if she said she wasn't interested? She would become the bad guy for not being 'open minded'.
That poor child is going to have to live through losing her father and gaining...what ever that is going to be.
Selfish.
Not nearly as selfish as your lack of compassion and understanding.
Why should I have compassion for an adult man who waits until after he has married and had a child to make this choice?
Understanding? I don't want nor need to understand what this person is doing.
I do have compassion for the child who will have her life turned upside down.
But of course, since my opinion isn't PC, well it must be wrong.....
Laura you have a rough road ahead of you but the journey will be worth it. This isn't a choice, it's how our brains are wired. Right wiring, born into the wrong body.
You people are horrible. It's his life, not yours. His decisions are to be made by him, not any of you.
heroicslugtest, please pick up some writing by Foucault. Study the history of psychiatry and the DSM and how mental pathologies are defined, yesterday and today. Your adherence to some vauge pseudo-positivist conception of mental health is impairing your ability to think.
I love how people say he's brave for doing this. So if I jumped the wall at the zoo and attemted to figt a lion, would I be brave or just out of my mind ? I just love how we've ' evolved ' to the point where we rationalise insanity as heroic. Look, I don't care one way or the other, as I don't pay this guy's mortgage.He can turn into a zebra for all I care ; but save words like brave and hero for things that warrant those words.This guy isn't brave...he's insane.
It's amazing how many people think their views somehow should be the law of the land. It is their life like your life is yours. So you dont agree with it, so what? His decision doesnt change my life in the slightest and I bet doesnt have anything to do with any other posters lives either.
This guy a crazy inside head.He mind laid off from life.He will have smelly tuna between legs which make weirdo wife say " wash that."
Wonder if his \ her music is going to start getting sappy and all Lifetime-Channelly.
I like how so many idiots here think their opinion concerning the lives of others is worth anything. If you don't like it, stay out from between their legs, morons.
I think transgender people are some of the bravest people around. Can any of us imagine what it would be like to be trapped in a body that doesn't match our psyche? They have a rough go of it. No one would choose to have to go through this. Not only the physical aspects, but the ridicule and lack of understanding that is rampant–as demonstrated on this site. To me these people are heroes.
I must be transbankroll – I am trapped in a body with too small of a bankroll.
Ditto
agree.
Wouldn't it be more brave to realize your limitations, accept who you are, regardless of what you'd like to be, and to go and live that life to the best of your ability. I wish I was born a genius, I wish I was born with amazing looks and great physical attributes, but I wasn't, I'm just pathetically average at everything. And you know what, that's okay, we all aren't born the way we want to be, dealing with it is a part of life, it's not perfect it's reality. The idea that we can just be whatever we want is a big problem with society today. Tom you're a man, like it or not you always will be, doesn't matter what you cut off or add, you can't change it. If you want to change your name or wear women's clothing go for it, you don't need to go through the pain of surgeries and drugs to live a different lifestyle. I wish the best for you.
Problem is I don't think it's the right answer for people to reject their body. I can understand social reasons why someone might be attracted to being more like one gender or another, but I still think it's unnatural to make changes to your body to become something it's not. Better to challenge gender roles while keeping your body the way it was designed.
@dave so you can strive to be smarter? You can't go to the gym or dress better because you should just be yourself? People should always try to better themselves. Never stop learning, never stop improving.
Good god he is going to make one ugly woman.
...and he'll turn you down like all the other women you've trolled on Craigslist.
Seems weird to me,but I hope he finds happiness. Best of luck!
what a freak...
these are some of the meanest posts i've seen.you may not be able to identify with this person,but come on its not easy having these feelings and being true to your self. I wish you the best of luck.God bless you and your family it wont be easy
Gross. Anyway I'm in a not very well known band so no one will care, but I've decided to be brave and come out and tell everyone that I am Transtiger. I am taking catnip and undergoing procedures to make me look and feel like the tiger I was born to be. I thank all of you for your support. Best Fishes 🙂 lol that's a cat joke. I'm not crazy.
Maybe "She" could marry a real man, someone like "Chaz Bono"... Actually too bad they hadn't met sooner, and decided to have their transgender surgeries together. A little "cut and paste", and everybody's happy...
Girls will be boys, and boys will be girls, it's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world...
More cut than paste, I fear.
except for lola of course...
I feel bad for him 🙁 he must be really screwed up in the head....I feel really bad for his wife and child.
I know. Shame on all these people who are encouraging him in his delusions.
Have some compassion, people. He needs psychiatric attention, not praise.
Hi Sweetie, how fast is the sind blowing where you are located?
Too bad, he's such a cute guy 🙁 He'll probably go from a cute guy to a strange looking girl.
In the words of Arnold you will be on ugly muthaf..ker
Why did the article keep referring to him as her? He has not even started yet. This reminds me of Chazz Bono? How is she a man, because she takes testosterone shots? Or how about the "man" who was the first man to get pregnant? Same thing. She was not a man, just a girl that takes testosterone shots once a week.
I agree with you there. Regardless of whether or not you support his decision or not, he is still a "he" until after his surgery, when she will be a "she".
i see that you are an expert on the subject. how many hours a day do you spend at the transgender sites?
Wife better get batteries.
Hope the wife likes tacos
First of all, why are they referring to him as 'her' already?? Second, he is gonna make for an ugly chick. The only ones that can pull this surgery off and actually look like a real girl are asians and Puerto Ricans.
How, are these lines from your new book, "50 shades of bigotry"?
I don't know about Puerto Ricans, but some transgender Asians look better than REAL God-made females. Go figure.
Society is moving away from recognizing and treating severe psychiatric disorders?
There is a movement afoot to praise them, normalize them, and participate in their delusions?
Why yes, this is my problem.
Exactly how is this your problem? And how is transgender surgery not a treatment, O Wise and All-Knowing?
You would have loved working in a Psych hospital anytine before JFK.
So if this is the singer, will his voice change? Will the band continue? The article didn't address this and I am curious!
The band, currently on tour with The Cult, will continue. Her voice will not change as this is something that does not occur because of hormone therapy, etc...its pretty much set in puberty because of vocal chord development
Damn shame if it loved itself it would love its manhood if it had any damn shame as bad as gay marriage
What???
Bama. 'Nuff said.
What's the wife going to say Tomaseena craves some dick?
i think eating pizza with pineapple is weird. i think wearing skinny jeans is really weird. i think the sport of Cricket is bizarre. it DOESN'T mean i hate people who like those things. it DOESN'T mean I want to outlaw those things. it DOESN'T mean i wouldn't hang out with people like those things. so calm down liberal thought police when i say:
this...is...supremely...bizarre
Bah. Pineapple pizza is awesome! Especially w/ ham!! 😉
Pineapple pizza with bacon and ham YESSSSS!!!!!! Having your weiner removed......YIKES!!!!
looney liberals strike again.
Whoever or whatever taught you think you are better than this person deserves less respect than one hair on his/her body.
...and this affects you how, again?
I could do with a kielbasa and a couple of meatballs for dinner. Yummmm!!
With a generous side of mayo!
Tom, I commend you for being strong. Your music is wonderful and if you want to live another way, then I hope it only makes you happy.
For those that are saying terrible things, use your narrowminded thoughts to focus on reality TV shows. THIS is real life, and people are doing what they need to do to be happy in this world. Stay pessimistic, stay sad, stay afraid. You will never change, but Tom and those who find happiness will change into whatever they want to live a good life.
IF SHE WANTS TO DANCE AND DRINK ALL NIGHT, WELL THERE'S NO ONE THAT CAN STOP HER!!! Way to go, Tom!
Tom,
Your sense of self is warped and, I suspect, underdeveloped.
I recommend you seek the counseling and psychiatric care you so desperately need. Mutilating yourself in an attempt to look like a woman will not make you more secure in who you are. It will only exacerbate your problem.
Absolutely beautiful sentiment.
It really doesn't affect anyone but him and his family, so I find it hilarous that so many people get bent out of shape. What does it matter to you what he does with his life? Reminds me of a saying my Aunt used to say, "you mind your manners and i'll mind my business".
Sorry you will never be a woman, you will just be a man who has had his penis surgically removed.
exactly!
As much as I hate to say it. I think you are 100% correct!
Someone exercising freedom of choice despite all of the inevitable bigotry he/she is bound to face (from people who somehow think this is THEIR issue) is a brave act indeed.
doing something that lots of people think is weird is not by itself a sign of bravery...unless you think the members of NAMBLA are brave.
Society is moving away from recognizing and treating severe psychiatric disorders to praising them and trying to normalize them.
Why yes, this is my problem.
I agree with you Beast!
Sorry you will never be a woman. You will be just a man who had his penis surgically removed.
Hey, why aren't you calling him brave like everyone else?
I mean her, her! Oh gods the PC police are comknmifgghjkl;'
Headline should read that he GOING to be transgender not that he is because he is clearly male looking with male parts presently. Should also wait on referring to the guy as a she until the transformation starts.
For some reason, I have no problems with gay people, but a Transgender just seems wrong and sick to me. This person, as with most trannys, just need serious psycho-therapy to work through their issues with their past. Usually, people who want to do this are just really screwed up in the head from being molested/raped as children. Being gay is one thing, but wanting to change your gender is unnatural, wrong, and should be outlawed.
Why should it be outlawed? What possible effect could a dude getting his parts chopped off have on your life? I'm not the biggest fan of it myself, but whatever....as long as my boys aren't getting chopped off it's none of my business.
Where did you say your PhD is from again?
I hope his wife enjoys sharing her underwear with this MAN. What do they do with the junk eventually cut off of him? And how do you shop for a size 13 pump-heel?
Probaby the same place you shop for a size 24 ladies dress. Being from Texas, you should be able to ask most of the women you know about that.
What a freaking weirdo, get some psych help before you go under the knife you nut job.
This is the first I've heard of someone being called transgender (and referred to by female pronouns) simply because he plans to undergo the procedure. It's like calling someone a father because he plans to have a child. Putting the ontological arguments aside, it just bothers me grammatically. It's specious and sappy to commend the journalist for using the "correct" personal pronouns.
second. Eff all the PC crap.he's a he until he ain't got no bollocks.
I'm a pretty liberal person, but I am getting sick of being told I need to accept this kind of thing. Where and when do we draw the line?
Really, I just want it all to go away. Wow, you're a "woman". Who cares? I'm not against it, but don't shove it down my throat (pun?). I don't flaunt my straight, white, atheist ways; I just adhere to them. Adhere to what you want, but the world really doesn't give a fark, so shaddup.
Ok, everybody: raise your hand if you don't like attention.
the mere fact that there is such a wide spectrum of hatred and such support for this individual, is exactly the reason of why it is so news worthy. This is not an issue to spark whether or not you agree with this person's choice, it is to educate you that there are other's out there different than you. How you deal with that truth, is probably pretty indicitive of how you walk through the world. Are you welcoming truth for what it is? or are you so afraid of it, that you feel compelled to destroy the truth. Either way..no matter what your belief is, this is truth. like it. or not...you don't get to control this one, so may as well learn to live on the planet that you do, it seems like a better option than hiding in your own little house of fantasy and lies.
Your statement is absolutely dead on right and one of the best posts I have ever read in any comments section. Kudos!
The hobo down the street is different from me too.
The difference is, when he acts crazy they call the cops.
When Tom from non-notable band acts crazy, he's "brave".
Well put, "truth." No one is asking for your approval, guys. Believe it or not, not everyone exists simply to please you.
Truth, I agree with you. We all need a little more TRUTH!! Great posts.
The name of the operation to go from male to female is called an "addadicktome"
+1
Serious question. Will he still be a guy or will his wife now be a lesbian?
To answer your question with my opinion, I believe that he/she will still be considered her husband. Most likely, she will see he/she through this and be supportive. Good question...
'Her' ???? Really???? Couldn't look more like a man to me. I'm sure his XY chromosomes agree with my conclusion, regardless of how absurd the politically correct/position advancement that CNN.com tries to push on its readers.
Why are you so up in arms? EVERY site and news outlet that is reporting on this is referring to Tom as her out of the respect for Tom's courage and belief in gender. SHE should be called as such. If everyone started calling you a female and giving you grief and your friend defended you as a male, would we call him crazy just because he's one person and all the IDIOTS are saying the wrong thing?
Grow up Mr. First World Problems.
That bone structure and that solid chin? Not gonna be a pretty woman. :/
It's a man. Soon it will be a man with mutilated genitals. You don't get to pick and choose what gender you are.
Look out, an avalanche of comments are headed your way.
From people who prefer to participate in these poor folk's delusions.
I don't understand that sort of cruelty.
If he thought he was a time traveling fish, would they support that too?
Right, born physically a male, mentally a female.
Your god sure knows how to make 'em.
That dude is gonna be one ugly chick!
Omfg what is this world coming to. Why does this have to be posted on a national news website and shoved down the normal societies throat.
How else are they going to normalise their agenda to have the dysfunctional be praised?
Think, man!
To let the world know that truth is stranger than fiction. To let the world know that books should not be judged by their covers, or judged at all, for that matter. To let the world know that reality is NOT a discreet matter of black and white. To let the world know that it's important to be true to yourself and that what other people think does not matter. To bring the bigotry and ignorance out of the woodwork. Finally, who cares what you think...you don't actually matter.
why does it matter so much to you...why read the article and then make nasty remarks...life is just experience and what ever road someone wants to take (an adult) is their choice...we love you even though your cold...
to Dude looks... great comment...remember in the end it's all just EXPERIENCE!
Dude Looks Like a Laity: This poor man's preferences have no bearing on reality.
Surgery will result in his outward appearance more accurately reflecting his deep inner confusion.
It will not make him a woman. It will make him a eunuch.
Why does it have to be glorified on national news. Good for him for coming out to his friends and family. But that is as far as it should go. It doesn't need to be made public for young adolescents to see.
And the news site made you click on the link and read the story how..? If you don't like it, don't read it. I don't see anyone "shoving it down your throat".
I think EVERYONE has a right to live theirs as they want to!!! If you wanted to live your life differently wouldn't it be nice to do so without a bunch of BS from everyone else? Think about THAT!!!!
If I wanted to live my life as Tiamator, the Great Lizard-King of all Mankind–and I expected everyone to treat me as such–would you just say, "Oh, okay." ?
Or would you suspect mental illness? It's a matter of degrees.
He will always be male just like Chaz will always be female. He can't give birth and Chaz can't produce sperm. 'Nuff said.....
Today's non-sequitor brought to you by...
So...along that line of thought, any woman who is unable to give birth or any man who is unable to produce viable sperm is not a "real" woman or man respectively?
Dude is gross
She? Her? And she's going to become a woman so that she can be a gay woman living with his, I mean her current wife? Man, I can't keep up! This is crazy stuff! See, gay is a choice then since today he's straight and flipping to gay. Too much of a mind bender after 5 pm and not worth the effort to figure out...
maybe your life style to others may be disgusting to them..are you a christian...what happen to the love thing...why why why it's NOT up to us to judge anyone not even you..sir in ohio reach in and find some good apparently his family has...
@ Convoluted - We are called to judge to discernment but not to condemnation to hell. Only Jesus can do that. Saying that we can't judge people's actions as right or wrong is simply ridiculous. We all make a significant number of judgements every day on how to live our lives properly.
"Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly.” John 7:24 (New International Version)
To make a decision like this is huge, to come out to the public is even more amazing. It is in the true spirit of punk rock. People are born what they are but the outside world cannot know what that really is. We know ourselves, our family knows us, and our friends know us. If going under the knife will save your life, a true and loving family will support that. We marry who we love. We are all changing in our form in some way or another. Being disgusted is a sign of being afraid.
No, actually it's just a sign of being disgusted.
Why is this national news. Why does the whole world have to know. And I don't think any body is afraid of a lesbian dude.
You know, some of you sound so ignorant. Go get an education, I promise it will open your mind. Learn to love yourself first, who cares what anyone else (like you morons) think... More power to her!
Alan
What class should everyone take to be as educated as you?
Will an education enable me to actively deny reality in favor of people's delusions?
Gosh. Education sure has changed. You got a pronoun wrong, Alana.
who ??????
Speaking words of wisdom
Let it be
Let it be
Well, "it" is certainly an apt appellation.
I can't understand why the wife would want to say married to this guy, I mean girl. He's going to turn into a man trying to pass himself off as a woman. And we know that he's not going to fool anybody. I feel sorry for her. I think eventually she's going to move on.
Sad for you to think that love resides between the legs and not in the heart. Real love will move past this.
There are freaks everywhere, and they walk among us. And vote. Etc etc. Not saying it is right, it is just reality.
so can you be born one gender and change as many times as you'd like? Do you even have to be limited to male or female, or are we as a culture not ready to accept that there could be more than two genders?
Is Jesus a gender?
I pick Jesus.
I suppose that with enough money that anything is possible. He could have 2 weiners and a phagina and maybe some far out cosmic s e x organ that no one hsa even heard of yet. Soceity should have a duty to protect people from themselves, but sometimes you just have to let them do what they gotta do.
I guess she kinda let this out in a little way in their song Ocean... It has the lyrics:
And if I could have chosen, I would have been born a woman
My mother once told me she would have named me Laura
I'd grow up to be strong and beautiful like her
One day, I'd find an honest man to make my husband
We would have two children, build our home on the Gulf of Mexico
Our family would spend hot summer days at the beach together
The sun would kiss our skin as we played in the sand and water
And we would know we loved each other without having to say it
That's nasty and not natural. Born a male, die a male. Born a female, die a female.
Greg, feel free to live up to that right now. Die a "man" now. The rest of us don't care what you think. If you think it's wrong, why are you bothering to read about it or comment on it. Loser.
Greg (and everyone else who thinks this is disgusting),
There's nothing nasty or unnatural about. Your comment only speaks to your close-minded ignorance. We only live once, and you should count your blessings that you don't know what it's like to feel that your body is in conflict with who you feel yourself to be inside. Do some reading so that you can have an informed opinion.
Dana, this close-minded ignorance that thou speakest off is simply the NORMAL way of thinking for all those in the world who have logic and common sense.
You are a bigoted idiot. How dare you make a judgment about how another person chooses to live their life. This has nothing to do with you. What makes you think you even get an opinion?
Steve, our right to free speech gives us a right to an opinion. If these people who are confused can express their unnatural views then why can't those in their right minds do so as well?
theres some imbalance there. so why not just get shots of male hormones rather than surgery AND FEMALE hormones?
It's not the hormones making transgender people feel the way they do. The hormones just change the body to match their soul.
He is a liberal. If he didn't do the most rediculous thing it means he is oppressed by Christians and closeminded.
He is a liberal. If he did the reasonable thing he would feel like society was oppressing him. Has to do the silliest thing otherwise Christain bigots will continue to rule the world with hate.
To each her own. I love my husband but I don't think I could handle it if he decided to become a girl. I prefer the male parts too much. Plus it would require a heck of a lot of electrolysis!
To everyone saying he'll always be a man because of his XY chromosomal makeup:
Shhhh.... Your facts are disruptive and insensitive!
This is about proper Liberal ideology, not the truth!
Uhm, its not Ideology when its true, he will never be a real woman, he cant have children and thats a huge part of being female, and thats more of a conservative view anyway. "God does this so we should do this" so (assuming you are a conservative due to your illogical statement and Liberal bash) i would like to point out that "God" made him a male, so he's going to go against "God" to become a female. why dont you try posting on a FOX site ~OBAMA 2012~
Heroic, this has nothing to do with politics. I'm so sick of everyone who thinks it does. There are gay and straights in both parties. There are transgenders of both parties. There are porn stars, chefs, teachers, ministers, interracial couples, you name it of both parties. Your sort of comment just makes you look ignorant. My wife and I are both liberals, but we would never dream of having an abortion. Fools like you keep trying to draw a big line down the middle of society and demanding everyone stand on one side or the other with no gray area and no overlap. All that does is lead to discord. All YOU want to do is pigeon-hole everyone so you know who to shoot after the takeover.
hah, I made that comment and am actually pretty much a lineral. I just also like to call a spade a spade so to speak. Just because I stick a horn on my head and attach a long white tail to my butt and want to call myself a unicorn does NOT make me a unicorn hah.
Bobby,
Your rambling, incoherent response leaves me utterly baffled. Only the literary equivalent of a bumper sticker at the end of your statement offers me any sort of clue as to where you stand on this issue.
I understand it must be difficult to argue in favor of something so obviously wrong. I suggest you stop trying.
me,
As an atheist who finds himself on the conservative side of arguments more often than not, I acknowledge that both parties have their share of people who don't fit the norm.
However, I am not trying to pigeonhole anyone. I'm simply saying that this article's attempt to normalise this sort of thing by giving it a scientific-sounding name and using gender pronouns contrary to reality are a product of a progressive or liberal ideology.
When reality is ignored to such an extent (such as calling this man a woman) because of something or in aid of something. That something is, in this case, that dirty "L" word: Liberalism.
Considering this guy has not started the work there is a lot of her and she in the article. Never heard of this group.
Agreed.
I have nothing against trying to pass yourself off as a woman if you are born a man and vice versa if that's what it takes to make you happy. But the fact is that a man has an x and a y chromosome and so does this person. No amount of surgery or therapy will change that, and expecting others to play along with your delusions is just plain silly. He's a he!!!
Actually a woman can be born with an x and y chromosome. Due to a mutation in the receptor for testosterone, the hormone is not recieved and estrogen is produced instead.
Actually, there are lots of people walking around that look 100% male or female that are genetically just the opposite. And I mean from birth, naturally. There have been female athletes tested for gender that came up scientifically as male, yet there was an abundance of proof that they had always been female (school records, doctor records, childhood photos, etc).
Don't care, man or woman, it's your thang, do what you wanna do.
Obviously "she" doesn't really give a flip about what others think, so why bother boring everyone with your opinions?
Just call her, ahem, him...."it"..
Who cares. All you people need brain-reassinment surgery.
And before any of you d-bags point out my brainless spelling error, i see it too.
Just proof we need less male organs occupying this planet.
Rightey Oh Mate!
Shocked but supportive. More power to him...er...her.
If your winkie is bigger than mine can I have it after your surgery to replace mine?
It is sort of fun to watch the evangelicals get all riled up.
It's sort of fun to watch confused people cut their junk off
What does this even have to do with evangelicals, Jimbo? It's the vast majority of us who aren't necessarily very religious, those of us who obviously do believe in evolution, etc., etc., who also know that guys like this singer have some serious problems, but he certainly is not a she.
It just seems to me that he would have known that before he married and had kids. He's going to make a really ugly woman with all those tattoos and big arms. Chaz Bono's girl friend left him after he did it. His wife says that she will stay, but I bet she leaves. She married a man and now he expects her to sleeps with a woman? That's so selfish.
I was married four years before I came out and transitioned, and we just recently celebrated our 12th anniversary. We've grown progressively closer over the years,enjoying an understanding and friendship deeper and more honest and genuine than you can probably imagine. We share everything - except our toothbrushes and our respective long-term lovers who fit us like the proverbial glove and provide that one big thing we can't provide each other, if ya know what I mean.
Yes, I knew since childhood that I was different, but if you read many of the comments on this thread you might see why I would try to keep such a thing well hidden. It was my beautiful partner's unconditional love that gave me the strength to finally be myself. If you're one of those who find me disgusting and worthy of your public abuse, I only ask you to give yourself a chance to grow. Often, understanding requires more effort than condemnation, but its rewards are far greater. Peace.
I don't see a byline anywhere, but hey writer: you're using the wrong gender pronoun.
This whole "treat them as what they want to be" thing is a bad idea.
I'm a writer too, but I want to be.... the Mighty Lizard-King. So treat me like Him.
Or you're disrespecting my freedom to choose. Otherwise–you know–bogus lawsuits.
As with Evolving, I applaud the author's correct use of pronouns. I feel I must point out, however, that the headline righter used an incorrect pronoun. Hopefully that is rectified...
You sure are throwing 5$ words around when you can't even spell WRITER...
He can never become a woman. No matter how much surgery or hormone injections this guy takes, he will always have XY chromosomes.
Gender cannot be boiled down to chromosones. Consider Klinefelter's syndrome where a male is born with an extra X chromosone for a combination of XXY. Some males are also born with an extra Y, making an XXY cominbation, or even an extra X and Y chromosone making a combination of XXYY. Some females have four X chromosones, instead of two.
Gender stems from a mix of biologic and social forces. Presumably, if Tom Gabel is electing to make the transition, she must feel like she is trapped in a male body. Decisions like that are not lightly made, so her decision must come from an intrinsic recognition that she is a woman.
I hear what you're saying Mike, but the examples are not hat supportive of what's going on here with Tom. XX or XY. If there was such a thing where XX made a man then XX would be a man, but it's not. Something went haywire with Tom's identification of himself as a man. That is a mental disorder more than anything else. I suppose that the dude that tattooed himself and cut his tongue to look like a reptile is just exercsing personal choice too, but it doesn't make me think that it is any less weird. Live your life how you want, but make a decision and live with it. Hopefully Tom won't want to go back to being a dude a few years form now.
So, he is a straight man, with a wife and child. Appears to be happliy married and is now deciding to become a woman. This makes no sense. Against Me...well if you havn't heard of them you are about to. Nice publicity stunt dude.
This is absolutely disgusting. The man needs to be mentally evaluated and possibly committed. How can his wife and daughter be okay and accepting with this? His wife married a man because she likes men. What will this do to their relationship?
agreed.
Agreed. Eccentricity is one thing, but I can remember when people this dysfunctional were understood to be ill and given the appropriate psychiatric/medical treatment.
Now if you're messed up in the head they call you "unique" and shower you with praise for your "bravery". Sigh.
man i wish i could clone myself just to have seeex w/myself...
Wow there are some negative creeps on this page. You all should then move to North Carolina, Romneyville. On a more positive note, Brian from Gaslight Anthem put it most elequently:
So Tom's gonna be Laura now… and in 2012 I still find people on the internet commenting on another persons life how they insult and condemn a person for his choices," the band wrote. "How about the people who go through this and never find peace and end up committing suicide? Would you rather that? Or maybe he could become a raging drug addict and ruin his life and family? Would you rather that?"
"How about you leave the guy alone. How about you let another human being make a decision about their lives without your snide prejudices and bigotry?" the post continues. "This is one of the hardest decisions a person can make. From my limited understanding of the subject, it means feeling your whole life like you were born in the wrong skin. That’s something that 99 percent of us can't understand. Whether you agree or don't, it's not your life. It's not your family. It's not your band, it's theirs."
Jesus is the answer.
When we disagree with your ideas ,we became haters and means and blah blah blah? why we have to accept your opinions? why we have to think like you? well like me I found this disgusting ,repugnant,out of their minds....why to cut and chop your body parts? it is sickening! in top of that he is married ,poor wife poor daughter not matter if they accept it is not right it is WRONG!
I'd respond to Brian from Poorlynamed Band by saying:
"How about these people are effed up in the head, and should be cared for, not encouraged. If he felt he should have been born a pony, you'd want to send him to the loony bin–I hope."
Self-absorbed are we, Maria? You really think your opinion regarding gender re-assignment matters more than the wife and child of someone who's going through it? Also, ESL courses are available at most community colleges. You should spend your time on that instead of being morally outraged about the personal life decisions of strangers.
And Brian and Tom are both pretty incredible people. Not surprised he would say it so well. Thanks for sharing it....
Well said Tom! We live in the most judgemental country on earth. When did people become so hateful and critical? Most of the comments posted are downright horrible and disgusting. Bunch of hypocrites.
I applaud your writer for using the correct pronouns, "she" and "her" and to Laura I say, "Rock on, girl!!"
freakishly wrong-no hatred, but u are what ur born.
Well Scott, by way of grammatical use, you will then always be an idiot.
So, if you were born deaf and you had the chance to become hearing, you would turn it down because "u are what ur born"?
Imagine the anguish that Tom has to face each day because of his affliction. He cannot become a female genotypically, but he can pretend to be one phenotypically. This is a disturbing mental disorder.
Great, but who the hell's Against Mel?
She? SHE??? OMG! The man was born a MAN and will ALWAYS be a man!
Geez, the brainwashed intelligence of humans we now have in this world is just astonishing!
Speaking of brainwashed. Your mind sounds fairly rigid.
YES , thank you....stupid media, always pandering to the leftist touch feely crowd. HE is a man and not matter what HE does HE will always be one.
Her? Not quite yet. Even "she" says she is just beginning the process, and will take a new name at that time. So, no new name, then "she" still considers "herself" male. And then, does that make both "her" and "her" wife into gay females? Neither apparently wants to be married to a man And if they are both female, how can they be married at all (what state do they live in)?
style and proper etiquette dictate that you refer to an transgendered person as the gender that they identify with. So, yes, “her” and “she”.
Style and proper etiquette? Would you find that after the chapter on which fork to use and how to sit in a skirt?
I was thinking a similar thing. Why is the reporter calling this guy "her", "she", etc. It's a guy, no matter what he THINKS he is. Having psychological problems like this guy does is bad, and I wish him well, but he ain't a she!
Kudos to you! Much love and many well wishes for your transition 🙂
"Transition"? Oh, please, get back on this planet...
never heard of him. in a few minutes i'll forgret that I ever heard of him....
Indeed. This gender dyphoria is a sick disease. I would not want to be afflicted with it. To be carved into the opposite gender is pretty drastic.
Lol funny same here too
Good for her! Glad she has finally come to terms, and understands herself.
Disgustingly awesome. You wish you had half as much courage Ed.
I don't know man. Pretty weird. I accept gay marriage but this is just like...what? Can my dog transition to a frog because she sounds like a frog when she barks?
those are two completely different species, what are you talking about?
That is dumb.
A Frog?
ROFL BRANDON, ROFLLLLLLLL!
Disgusting!
Yes you are ED , you are totally disgusting.
Totally agree with you Mike.