The secret's out on 'New Girl'
April 4th, 2012
11:56 AM ET

The secret's out on 'New Girl'

It finally happened: Jess found out about Cece and Schmidt sleeping together!

Winston couldn't take the pressure of knowing about Cece and Schmidt and he had to tell someone, so he told Nick: "I saw something a few days ago. I've been sworn to secrecy, but it is just too big."

Then Nick spilled the beans to Jess in literally less than a minute. Way to go, Nick.

Schmidt, meanwhile, wanted a moment to celebrate: "Schmidty really did it this time. I mean, I'm having Indian every night."

Jess wasn't in the mood for celebrating though - more like freaking out. When she asked Cece and Schmidt about when they started having sex, Schmidt gave such a "Schmidty" answer: "1:03 a.m., February 15. Right.on.schedule."

Cece could only explain it as "something that happened and then it got out of control. It was sort of like poison oak, and I just couldn't stop scratching it."

But Jess was mainly upset because Cece kept a secret from her. She then tries to eliminate all of the lies and secrets in the apartment, but decides that wasn't a good idea after she finds out all three of the guys have thought about her when they...shall we say, make love to themselves.

I thought it was very adorkable of her to think they didn't fantasize about her. I mean seriously, three guys and one girl? Of course their thoughts get dirty.

"Schmidt has been having consensual sex with Cece and lying about it. He's better than us at this - Winston and I hate it as much as you do!" Nick tells her.

Speaking of Nick, he was having more trouble than Cece keeping secrets: He's acquired a new hobby of sleeping with 20-something college girls, and he's not very good at juggling multiple women. So he did something that proved how desperate he was. He asked Schmidt for help: "Schmidt, I need you to teach me how to be a douche bag."

Schmidt and Nick then begin a series of role-playing exercises, which became more and more awkward. Especially when they ended up in bed together and Schmidt was telling Nick how good he gave it to him the night before and how he gave him "the full business."

Despite how weird it was to see Schmidt give someone advice, it worked. Nick was successful at being a douchebag in the end. If anyone can teach someone to be a douchebag, Schmidt can. He's basically made a profession out of it. (Remember the douchebag jar?)

Cece tells Jess that she stopped spilling her secrets because she's judgmental, but Jess later realizes that the real reason Cece didn't want to tell her about Schmidt was because she actually likes him. Cece admitted that she likes Schmidt, and made Jess swear to keep it a secret.

"New Girl" has been getting better and better to me, and I really like the way the story lines are unfolding. The writing seems to be getting more hilarious every week. It's taken a while, but I can officially say I'm hooked!

soundoff (17 Responses)
  1. Cozi


    April 5, 2012 at 10:02 am | Report abuse |

    lol, he couldnt hold onto it any more, so he swap d cow out of his cave

    April 4, 2012 at 5:32 pm | Report abuse |
  3. Modern Family Sucks

    anyone who likes Modern Family has to be borderline autistic... that show is bland and tired...

    April 4, 2012 at 3:24 pm | Report abuse |
    • Lem

      Yeah. It is a D00 D00 show for girls. I think you can catch cooties just from watching it.

      April 4, 2012 at 4:42 pm | Report abuse |
  4. Hey

    The adult cartoon you're referring to is Family Guy which IS getting old. Modern family is a different show entirely and is equally great to the New girl. Love both!

    April 4, 2012 at 3:13 pm | Report abuse |
  5. Obsurder

    That Schmidt guy has a great body, but he's kinda ugly and he has moles all over... *Shudder!* Ewwwww...

    April 4, 2012 at 2:47 pm | Report abuse |
  6. Edna

    Im tired of cartoons like Modern Family. The are so pretentious. Adult cartoons are just dumb.

    April 4, 2012 at 2:11 pm | Report abuse |
  7. Tim

    Yeah. Modern Family rules ! It's got that little talking dog and Stewie the rude baby on it. It is an animated sensation.

    April 4, 2012 at 2:01 pm | Report abuse |
  8. @Melodie

    NO WAY is New Girl better than Modern Family. New Girl is maybe 7/10 while Modern Family is 11/10....that show is INCREDIBLE. You obviously do not know good TV if you think New Girl > Modern Family. Wow. Dumbest comment ever.

    April 4, 2012 at 1:30 pm | Report abuse |
  9. Melodie

    Modern Family. That's the other show. This is even better than Modeen Family. It makes me happy to see it.

    April 4, 2012 at 1:21 pm | Report abuse |
  10. Observer

    This is, hands down, the dumbest show that has ever been broadcast, and that it really saying something.

    April 4, 2012 at 12:57 pm | Report abuse |
  11. Melodie

    Me too. I love this show too. It's even better than Community and that other program.

    April 4, 2012 at 12:53 pm | Report abuse |
  12. Arrum

    Oh gosh I love this show. It is probably the best on television. I love how it portrays us Mormons and Joseph Smith in such a positive way. BYTV has once again created a family friendly program all can enjoy.

    April 4, 2012 at 12:21 pm | Report abuse |

Post a comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.

About this blog

Our daily cheat-sheet for breaking celebrity news, Hollywood buzz and your pop-culture obsessions.