April 3rd, 2011
05:20 PM ET
I wanted to love it. Really, I did. So did everyone else walking into the Fox Theater in Detroit on Saturday night. No one knew what to expect, but people paid lots of money to see what Charlie Sheen was going to bring.
My hometown of Detroit - America's comeback city - was playing host to Charlie's own big comeback. It was going to be like group therapy: A city defeated, but in the middle of resurrecting itself, just like Charlie.
The people in that audience felt like they had a lot in common with the Warlock. He enjoys his vices, and stood up to his bosses in corporate America. Detroit fans came ready for him to bring some of that #winning.
I bought more than $100 bucks worth of merchandise and I wasn't alone. The lines were long for people wanting a little bit of Charlie. The lines were long for beer, too... It was going to one big raucous party, Charlie-style.
The show was supposed to begin at 8 p.m., but like any concert, it took a while for anyone to take the stage. People were drinking beer in plastic cups and the crowd was mellow. Charlie showed up and introduced his stand-up comedian friend who was "opening" for him.
Maybe this guy was funny in a small comedy club, but this was a huge, sold-out venue. Eventually he was heckled off the stage by an increasingly intoxicated crowd.
Then came the big lull.... The lights came up and a DJ started playing party tunes. Finally, the two women whom Charlie chose from YouTube submissions came on stage to sing the National Anthem. Looking back, this was the best part of the show.
Charlie returned to the stage and put on a "Two and a Half Men" shirt, took it off and ordered the "goddesses" to burn it. At this point, the crowd was still with him. He put on a Detroit Tigers jersey and nearly got a standing ovation.
That's pretty much where the love-fest ended.
During the entire show, he had a multimedia display on stage, showing his new app "Mansheen." He rambled on about warlock life and the trolls. This is funny for five minutes. 20 minutes? MAKE IT STOPI!!
Charlie kept trying to talk to the crowd and wanted them to ask him questions. He couldn't hear as people shouted out. He then decided to play a clip from a movie he wrote and produced in the mid-'80s called "RPG" (rocket propelled grenade), starring a very young Johnny Depp. Apparently, it was about redemption. Naturally, everyone started booing.
Charlie ended the clip abruptly, went back on stage and said, "I get it. You want more of me." So he began to tell stories about crack. Yes, crack. He told the audience that Detroit would understand stories about people on crack. Not funny. Cue the audience beginning to yell, "Reeeeeeeefund reeeeefunnd!"
And that's when the mass exodus began.
Charlie said, "I get it. You want big musical numbers." He introduced a singer who introduced the video for Snoop Dogg's new song, "Winning." The only problem was, Snoop wasn't even there. After the video played, Charlie never came back to officially end the show. For the first time in his life, it looked like Charlie was leaving the party early.
As I watched the tour bus pull away at about 1 a.m., en route for the second sold out date in Chicago, I just felt sad for Charlie. I wanted him to win and win in my hometown. Both needed each other. Maybe tonight in Chicago.... #keepinghopealive
For the latest on Charlie Sheen, watch HLN's "Showbiz Tonight" at 5 p.m. and 11 p.m. ET on Monday.
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