Michelle has a plan on 'The Bachelor'
February 8th, 2011
12:52 PM ET

Michelle has a plan on 'The Bachelor'

Last night's episode of "The Bachelor" began with Brad and the eight remaining women arriving in Costa Rica for a week of fun and adventure, though I'm pretty sure at least half of them couldn't find Costa Rica on a map.

Brad gives the ladies a tour of the hotel they are all staying at, and he's looking quite sweaty. Guess he remembered his passport, but not the deodorant.

Chantal is the recipient of the first individual date, and the show's resident cartoon villain, Michelle, is not happy about it, wishing that Chantal gets attacked by monkeys and apes during her date. (Well, Tortuguero National Park in Costa Rica is home to several species of monkeys...)

Brad and Chantal head to a zip line for their date, and they're very excited. So much so, that they talk about their excitement a few dozen times while they're together. Perhaps once they finish their zip lining, they'll win a thesaurus to learn words synonymous with "excited."

Heavy rain forces Chantal and plaid-clad Brad to his hotel room for dinner, where Chantal apparently looks "amazing" in one of Brad's dress shirts. Not sure if that's a compliment, but Chantal gets a rose nonetheless.

Then it was group date time and Michelle, whose slogan is "I hate group dates," tells us that she hates being on group dates. Brad takes Michelle and five others to the top of a waterfall, where they would rappel 600 feet to the bottom. Michelle, as usual, is not amused by this, as she rappelled down a building with Brad a few weeks back, and Brad promised there would be no more rappelling unless the two go together. 

But wait just one second! Brad tells Michelle that he's not breaking any promise, and pledges to rappel down the waterfall with Michelle. Michelle is happy, while the other women are confused.

After the waterfall, Brad and the women head to the "natural hot springs" of Costa Rica for an after party (again with the pools). Brad says he would spend the time trying to make everyone happy, but nothing seems to work, so he doesn't hand out any roses.

Alli is the recipient of the second individual date, and Brad pledges to take her to the "most romantic place on Earth."  Apparently that place is an ancient cave filled with bats, spiders and various other creatures you'd find in Halloween TV specials.  Perhaps Brad's dream date is Indiana Jones?

Brad tells Alli that he's looking for a "natural connection" with the woman he picks to be his wife, and he doesn't have that with her, so Alli heads home.

Brad says he needs some downtime in his hotel room after what's transpired, but that's not going to happen as Michelle drops by, telling him that she agrees with Alli's elimination but disagrees with Chantal getting a rose. She then proposes the next six eliminations, leaving her as the sole survivor and possibly running the show afoul of the FCC. Brad thinks Michelle's ideas are intriguing, but doesn't wish to subscribe to her newsletter, so she departs.

At the cocktail party, Brad and Michelle clash over what happened at the hotel room, with Brad saying that their relationship went "10 steps back." So this must mean Michelle is getting the boot, right?

Wrong. Remembering that the ratings come first, Brad says farewell to Jackie, whose only contribution this week was possibly soiling herself while rappelling down the waterfall.

Next week, Brad and the six remaining women head to the Caribbean island of Anguilla. In the interim, they may compete to be the first to find Anguilla on a map. I give them at least a week to succeed.

What did you think of last night's "Bachelor" episode?

soundoff (15 Responses)
  1. michelle

    hell yeah my most hated girl is gone michelle i cannot stand that bitc* u should of left along time ago u see brad got tired of ur ass en my two favorites are still on the bachelor shawntel en the blonde one of them must win i want shawntel she reminds me of a girlfriend that i talk 2 n she es the sweetest ever girl u are beautiful if u dont end up with brad he es crazy or even the blond not asheley but the one that has a little girl u are my second most favorite love both u en shawntell since the beginning. sorry michelle brad got tired of ur shi* i was laughing when i saw u en the limo u dont deserve 2 be with him u would of drove 2 make him un happy u deseved it i am glad u are finally gone now i can have a normal time when i watch the next episode i hear ur gone make a movie i would jus like 2 see it n see how u play en it i hope u dont sux but i know u will cause u were always my least favorite je je je je how do u feel now u jealous drama bitc*

    February 15, 2011 at 8:34 pm | Report abuse |
  2. Justin Bieber

    I am gonna pump Halle and make her scream. Skip all this racism and one drop talk. All that matters is that Bieber is ready for action. Black, white, yellow…who cares. They are all pink on the inside. Let’s booze it up and bang some hos!! -Bieber

    February 9, 2011 at 11:56 pm | Report abuse |
  3. Dani

    Brad's script: " you look so amazing" "I am so excited" "thank you so much"
    This show is starting to put me to sleep!

    February 8, 2011 at 9:07 pm | Report abuse |
  4. Yana

    ...of course it's the ratings – I could NOT believe that Brad (he's a wimp anyway) had such a seemingly hard time picking Michelle over Jackie last night – what suspense!!! If he ends up with Michelle, then he deserves everything he gets, because he will be getting plenty – of jealousy, control, mood swings – you name it, Michelle can do it. I don't know why Brad doesn't tell her to get lost when she keeps butting in on other conversations, and even visiting him in his room – he is definitely blind!!

    February 8, 2011 at 4:44 pm | Report abuse |
  5. jillmarie

    Check out Reality Steve's blog- it's filled with accurate spoilers. Next week, Britt gets the 1 on 1 date, and gets sent home. At the rose ceremony, guess who gets the boot? Michelle does. Then, following hometown dates, Shawntel. Then Ashley. Final two- Emily is eliminated and he is currently engaged to Chantal. Emily is the frontrunner for Bachelorette.
    The scary thing is, Michelle was only a bit off with her eliminations. She's an actress. Check ou her stats on IMDB- her name is Michelle Money. She has a movie coming out this month. She is probably a bit crazy, but who knows what the producers are getting her to say for camera time. I don't think this is a good career move for her- she's very pretty but has become unlikable- I'll watch her movie if I can see it for free- but I'm not a fan.

    February 8, 2011 at 3:41 pm | Report abuse |
  6. sandy

    if brad keeps michaelle he will have a miserable life with her. she is a psycho and stalker and if i were brad i would really get rid of her. he should of gotten rid of her a long time ago. if i were trying to meet someone and i had a man coming onto me like that he would of been long gone.

    February 8, 2011 at 3:14 pm | Report abuse |
  7. Michelle

    I might get hate comments, but who cares! It's my opinion god-dang it!lol

    I love Michelle! She's soooooo entertaining to watch and the dumb/funny comments that come out of her mouth?! COME ONNNNNN!!! Makes this "Telenovela" viewable! Otherwise, we'd have a corny @$$ show!

    I'm so glad this season's "screwball" is lasting this long...! =)

    February 8, 2011 at 3:13 pm | Report abuse |
  8. Chotstjm

    I think it is stupid to exploit a raving psycho for ratings! They need to get rid of her.

    She reminds of Jessica Walters in Play Misty for Me, or Kathy Bates opposite James Caan

    February 8, 2011 at 2:45 pm | Report abuse |
  9. nauna0924

    It's all in the ratings................Stalker big time!!!!!!!!!! Brad come on..................

    February 8, 2011 at 2:20 pm | Report abuse |
  10. superfankph

    Michelle's a psycho. she's just comes off as desperate – such a waste of a pretty face

    February 8, 2011 at 2:06 pm | Report abuse |
    • Marty

      I agree that she is a witch, but I don't even think she is pretty. Plus pretty is as pretty does and she does evil!!!

      February 8, 2011 at 3:51 pm | Report abuse |
  11. Vic L

    How happy do you think the producers and show sponsors would be if Brad does not keep Michelle until the last two or three. Think about it, Michelle in the last two standing? It will be a rating blitz that bring in the dollars for all concerned. I've no doubt Brad will have the final choice. But you know Michelle is here to stay for several more weeks yet. What a great scripted soap opera the Batchelor has become. Keep on watching you fools.

    February 8, 2011 at 1:48 pm | Report abuse |
  12. Scoobydoo54935

    I am sure he is only keeping her on for ratings. Every week she just proves more and more what a crazy (almost stalker like) person she really is.

    February 8, 2011 at 1:41 pm | Report abuse |
  13. Ann Couples

    I think Michelle is a B____CH!!! and very controlling. I can't tell if she is a plant to try and disrupt the show but Brad is a fool if he chooses her. Her jealousy will destroy them if they end up together. She amazes me how she thinks she HAS THE RIGHT to tell Brad what to do and when. I hope his therapy will help him see straight through her.

    February 8, 2011 at 1:21 pm | Report abuse |

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