Below is a transcript of "The Tonight Show" opening monologue from January 20th: Hello, I’m Conan O’Brien, sorry if I’m a little late…I had a job interview at Lady Foot Locker. I should have known something was up when NBC sent me that 2010 calendar that only went up to January. Over the past week, … Continue reading Transcript: Conan O'Brien's January 20 monologue