July 3rd, 2012
11:02 AM ET
It was hometown date week on Monday's episode of "The Bachelorette," and Emily paid a visit to the families of the four remaining contestants.
But first, she needed to make a stop in Charlotte to check on the daughter she abandoned while she went man-hopping in Europe.
While at home, Emily reminded the audience why she likes the four remaining men, conveniently forgetting the fact that she had a snit over Arie dating a show producer once upon a time.
Our first stop on the "Meet the Family" tour was Chicago, where "Bobblehead" Chris introduced Emily to the "closest thing" Chicago has to a castle, but failed to provide a description.
He also said that his family is so Polish, on a "scale of one to Polish" they're Polish. There's a joke in there somewhere, but I'm having a really hard time finding it.
Chris and Emily then went to a Polish-American restaurant, so noted because it said "Polish-American Restaurant" on the front. Maybe it's me, but I found it funny that the show blurred out the names of the credit cards the eatery accepted. When MasterCard and Visa want nothing to do with this show, you know you're in trouble.
I normally don't talk about commercial breaks on "The Bachelorette," but I feel the need to speak out today. By my estimation, ABC aired some 200 commercials promoting "The Glass House" during last night's show. ("The Glass House" being the "Big Brother" ripoff that's been doing test pattern-like numbers for ABC since it premiered in June, so I presume the network is desperate for anybody to watch this.)
Unfortunately, the network appeared to give away so much about the show that I had no interest in sampling it. If "Glass House" actually survives another week, I wouldn't be surprised if ABC started offering money to get people to watch.
Back on the "Bachelorette," Emily met up with Chris' parents and sisters. The lone highlight of the date was Chris telling his mom that he was a "hot mess" last week, and mom telling her son to kick some fanny. Nice to see the "Jersey Shore" writers making a few extra bucks on "The Bachelorette."
Our next stop was St. George, Utah, where Jef with one "f" was ready to show off Emily to his family. Jef's hair was so high this week, he could've been a T-Bird in "Grease." I was hoping the date would involve putting random objects on Jef's head to see if they'd stay on.
Alas, that didn't happen, but the two did have some fun riding a dune buggy and taking in some skeet shooting. Jef then said he wanted Emily "to hold a gun all day long." Goodnight everybody!
The family gathering consisted of Emily meeting several of Jef's siblings and their families, but not his parents. In the season's extremely awkward edit, Jef said his parents were in South Carolina "doing charity work."
But in a conference call with reporters a few weeks back, Jef mentioned that his parents were serving at a Mormon mission in South Carolina, adding that he was a "non-practicing" Mormon. I find it a tad puzzling that the show toned down the purpose of Jef's parents' work in South Carolina, especially given that missions are a critical part of LDS culture, unless Jef specifically requested that his Mormon background not be discussed on air.
Moving on to Scottsdale, Arizona, where Emily was "excited" about seeing Arie, as their relationship is "awesome." At this point, viewers playing the "Bachelorette" drinking game would be completely wasted.
Given their racing backgrounds, Emily and Arie met up at Phoenix International Speedway, where Arie demonstrated the power of the IndyCar to NASCAR-centric Emily.
The two then headed to the Luyendyk house to meet the brood, including Arie's dad, a two-time Indy 500 champion. Arie Sr., who's looking quite leathery, mentioned that his honeymoon revolved around racing, and Arie's mom told Emily that being married to a race car driver can be difficult, but it works. Arie Sr. also expressed hope that his son will make it to the end of the show.
Sadly, my dreams of Emily and Arie Sr. engaging in a heated debate over NASCAR and IndyCar failed to occur.
Our final stop was Dallas, where Emily couldn't stop talking about how perfect Sean is, especially after touring Sean's niece's life-size playhouse. Not sure what that has to do with Sean, but whatever.
Sean then had a confession to make - he still lives with his parents. Not only that, but his bedroom is a pigsty that's full of stuffed animals. Think Oscar Madison from "The Odd Couple" if he hoarded all of Felix Unger's stuff.
But wait a minute, it was all a ruse! Sean came clean that he doesn't live with his parents, and his family put together the dirty bedroom to give Emily a scare. An interesting prank to play on Emily, but the whole scenario looked like a plotline from every mediocre '80s sitcom.
At the rose ceremony, Emily opted to give Chris the boot. Why? Emily didn't have an explanation, and Chris reacted by proudly noting he's "10 times the man" of the three remaining finalists. Apparently, Chris is the cure for low testosterone.
Next week, Emily and the final three head to Curacao for swimming, romance and tears.
What did you think of last night's "Bachelorette" episode?
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