"Thank you, people whose Facebook profile picture is them as a baby, for basically saying, 'Here's the last time I wasn't ugly.'"
If that made you laugh, you can thank Jimmy Fallon, as it's just one of the many hilarious subjects he shows gratitude for in his new book, "Thank You Notes 2," arriving May 22, 2012. Co-written with the "Late Night with Jimmy Fallon" scribes, the book plays off the popular "Thank You Notes" segment on the show, and is the follow-up to his first published collection of "Thank You Notes."
Here's what else you shouldn't miss this week:
- Catch the "Billboard Music Awards" live at 8 p.m. ET on ABC to see performances by Justin Bieber, Carrie Underwood and LMFAO.
- Lady Gaga guest stars on "The Simpsons" season finale at 8 p.m. ET on Fox.
- The doctor is no longer in the "House" as the series finale of the Fox show airs at 8 p.m. ET. After eight seasons, House looks to the future and explores his demons, and the episode title "Swan Song; Everybody Dies" might be a major red herring of things to come.
- Catch a new episode of "The Bachelorette" at 9:01 p.m. ET on ABC.
- Time to say "goodbye" to the class of 2012 at McKinley High. Watch the season finale at 9 p.m. ET on Fox.
- Books coming out this week include: "Canada" by Richard Ford; "Beautiful Sacrifice" by Elizabeth Lowell; "It Worked for Me: In Life and Leadership" by Colin Powell; and "The Walking Dead Omnibus, Volume 1" by Robert Kirkman.
- Books and TV series coming to DVD and Blu-ray include: "Sherlock: Season Two"; "Red Tails"; "This Means War"; "The Woman in Black"; "The Secret World of Arrietty"; "Sade: Bring Me Home – Live 2011"; and "Perfect Sense."
- Music albums being released this week include: "Born and Raised" by John Mayer; "Everybody's Talkin'" by Tedeschi Trucks Band; "Not Your Kind of People" by Garbage; "Ram (Special Edition)" by Paul McCartney; and "Apocalyptic Love" by Slashand.
- Catch the season finale of "The Middle," where Mike's brother plans to get married at 8 p.m. ET on ABC.
- Then catch the "Modern Family" season finale where Gloria's bilingualism helps Mitchell and Cameron in adopting another baby at 9 p.m. ET. The first season finale of "Don't Trust the B-- in Apartment 23" airs at 9:32 p.m. ET.
- Watch who will be crowned as the next "American Idol," along with a performance by Rihanna, at 8 p.m. ET on Fox.
- Catch the series premiere of the singing competition "Duets" at 8 p.m. ET on ABC, which will feature Kelly Clarkson, John Legend, Jennifer Nettles and Robin Thicke as judges.
- Also catch the season premiere of "So You Think You Can Dance" at 8 p.m. ET on Fox.
- Movies coming to theaters this weekend include: "Men in Black 3"; "Chernobyl Diaries"; and "Moonrise Kingdom."