The 'New Girl' fully intends to brake for birds
February 1st, 2012
04:32 PM ET

The 'New Girl' fully intends to brake for birds

Raise your hand if you sensed something was going to go awry between Nick, Jess and Julia, because that's just what happened on Tuesday's episode.

Since Nick’s…well, they’re not using labels, so since his “Julia” is a lawyer, Jess gets her help fighting a traffic ticket.

Jess is her usual bubbly self, (offering Julia a blanket to get “toasty," and some pastries she baked), but after she explains that she ran the red light because she was trying to avoid hitting a bird, Julia makes a few condescending comments. (How much do you love Lizzy Caplan in this role?)

Jess quickly realizes Nick’s new girl doesn’t find her so adorkable, and when she fills Nick in on that, she also spills that Julia asked if Nick was seeing other people.

Nick freaks out and confronts Julia about it, and to save face, they both act like they’re sleeping with other people. (Because, you know, what good is honesty in a relationship?)

According to Nick, he’s having sex all the time: “I’m like a mailman, but instead of mail, it's hot sex I deliver.”

Julia, of course, does him one better: "I’ve had to start carrying my athletic shoes in my purse, because I have to spring from one sexual encounter to another.” At least she's keeping fit?

But in the end, it was Jess who got in the best line when she stood up to Nick’s…”Julia" and ended her speech with, “I’m about to go and pay this $800 fine, and my checks have baby farm animals on them b****!” Definitely the line of the night.

The issues between the two were miraculously resolved when Julia came by to apologize, and they ended up crocheting together.

But while Nick's "Julia" does become his girlfriend, and even Winston gets his game back, things don’t turn out so great for Schmidt.

Even after Jess suggested the roommates start hanging their towels on towel bars, Schmidt still has a mysteriously damp towel. Eventually he figures out that he and Nick have been using the same towel, a realization that sparked a hilarious conversation, because Nick doesn't wash his towels.

When the roommates judge him, Nick responds, “I don’t wash the towel, the towel washes me! …What am I going to do, wash the shower next?! Wash a bar of soap?!” Gross, but funny.

So do you foresee any future spats between Jess and Nick's "Julia" girlfriend? And what icky roommate behavior have you come across?


soundoff (5 Responses)
  1. brakes

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    May 13, 2012 at 11:43 pm | Report abuse |
  2. @sokman

    Really? who cares that you went to Taco Bell. It just shows that you're a taco eating fairy lard a55.

    February 2, 2012 at 10:52 am | Report abuse |
  3. Man who will not admit he watched show

    I cannot comment on this article because I did not watch the show. I was watching sports.......I was seriously.

    February 2, 2012 at 8:44 am | Report abuse |
  4. Sokman

    If that was the line of the night, I'm glad I went to Taco Bell when it was on. Best line of the night when I was there came from a couple of college kids sitting a couple tables over: Dude, just tell her you were abducted by a ufo, she's dumb as he11.

    February 1, 2012 at 11:01 pm | Report abuse |
  5. Big N8

    My cats like to take a bite of their dinner out of their dish, drop it on the floor, then eat it off the floor. I always clean with lysol wipes afterwards to prevent germs. They also like to drink out of the sink.

    February 1, 2012 at 4:53 pm | Report abuse |

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