July 11th, 2011
10:05 AM ET
Last night’s episode was the calm before the storm with witches gone rogue, a little role reversal between vamps and the emergence of a new top cat in Hotshot.
After Sookie rolled up on Eric dazed and confused and half-naked, she discovered that he had, in fact, taken a turn for the better. Kinder, though still true to his vampire urges, Sookie agreed to help him so long as he didn't touch and/or feed on her.
Eric told her what he could remember about his run-in with Marnie and the Moon Goddess crew. Sookie in turn told Pam what happened and a Pam-style freak out commenced.
She told Sookie that she would have to hide Eric, saying the witches who cursed him would eventually come looking for him. This was the first Sookie had heard about witches in Bon Temps. Her response – “Now I have to deal with witches?” – was likely something we all thought after watching the trailer for this season, but the bright side here is that they haven’t given us anything to complain about so far.
Pam also theorized that Bill set Eric up and sent him to confront the coven knowing he'd be attacked. And really, would it be a surprise at this point? With his newfound kingdom, Bill is much less benevolent monarch and way more douchey hard-ass in the vein of the late Magister. I’m not sure how this is all going to play out, but if he’s not actively pining over Sookie and we’re spared their corny sex-having music, I’m good.
Bill later met Portia Bellefleur for a business dinner where she proposed that they kick their relationship up a notch and start doing it. He obliged, but told her that he could never love her. They did it anyway. It’s good to be the king.
Meanwhile, Sookie heeded Pam’s warning and paid a visit to Alcide at his new place in Shreveport and asked him to babysit Eric. He didn’t have room at his place because – Callooh! Callay! – Debbie’s back!
When we last saw Debbie, she’d skittered off into the night after a fight with Sookie left her looking like the Joker. And even though she’s now sober and blonde and down with Jesus, the Hot Mess Express is back in the picture and there’s plenty of time left for her to fall apart. It’s probably bad karma to pray for a fictional character’s relapse, but somebody get this lady a V-drip, stat!
Elsewhere, the witches were all in a dither over Eric's visit. Lafayette stressed to the group that Eric wasn't someone to be messed with. He later told Jesus and Tara, in town from New Orleans, that he planned to make the trek to Fangtasia to beg Eric's forgiveness.
Lafayette’s plan backfired when he found himself back in Fangtasia's dungeon with Pam, but it wasn't long before Jesus and Tara arrived guns a blazin’ and told Pam that they could help reverse the curse. In true Pam fashion, she gave them 24 hours to produce Marnie…or else.
Over in Hotshot, the Land That Time and Soap Forgot, Jason continued to languish sexily on a filthy mattress after Crystal and Felton attempted to turn him into one of their own. He was drugged and later awoke to discover that all the women of childbearing age in the community were waiting in line to have sex with him.
Remember how I said this show owns the “WTF?” moment? Well here you go. Ugh.
In other news, Jessica told Hoyt about her indiscretion at Fangtasia. When he blew up at her, she glamoured him into forgetting about her confession.
And remember that creepy doll that appeared at the couple’s home last season? It keeps coming back despite repeated attempts to get rid of it. (A dash more nightmare juice, please!)
So who's behind it? Summer? Maxine? Perhaps Maxine cajoled Tommy into doing her bidding. After all, Tommy loves Jessica and hates Hoyt. Maxine wants her baby back and Jessica staked, so it’s possible.
After all, what else does Tommy have to do? His new life at Maxine’s consists of watching home shopping, learning to read and trying to rip her off, so there was plenty of time to torment his nemesis and the girl he secretly pined for.
And just when you thought we were rid of the fairies forever – and it finally, FINALLY looks like we might be – Claudine resurfaced and made yet another attempt to get Sookie to come with her. Mercifully, Eric appeared and drained her dry; in my opinion a perfect way to end the episode. You’ve always been my favorite, Northman.
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