March 4th, 2011
01:55 PM ET
I think it’s safe to say Sammi is winning her breakup with Ron. How does one win a breakup, you ask? By not following the other party around like a sad puppy dog, for starters.
With the exception of Ron, everyone seemed genuinely excited to welcome Sammi back. Especially Deena, who said she was just “histatic” about it. For those of you who don’t speak “Shore,” “histatic” is when you’re, “like, really happy.” Kind of like ecstatic, but different.
Another way to win a breakup is to have a better manicure and darker fake tan than your ex does.
When Sam tells Ron he looks pale (the ultimate insult on “Jersey Shore”), he says it’s because he thought he saw a ghost when she walked through the door. That's fair.
Sam continues to win when she dons a curve-hugging electric blue mini-dress that night. Flaunt it, girl! Ron tries to compliment her and hold her hand, but she’s not having it.
I was really proud of Sam until she said Ron needs to suffer for a little longer. Does that mean she’s just putting him through the ringer before she eventually takes him back? LAME.
Dear Ron and Sammi: Please don’t pull a robbery on another season of “Jersey Shore.” Should your issues continue in Italy, I swear, I will write you out of my recaps.
Meanwhile, much to Snooki’s dismay, Vinny brought a girl back to the house. Finally acknowledging that her feelings for Vin are more serious than she thought, she spends the entire night crying over him.
In a bout of comic relief, JWoww stops in an alley to take a leak on her way home from the bar. This is the second time JWoww has popped a squat in public. (Her first televised act of public urination took place behind the bar at Karma.)
The next morning, once Snooki has dried her eyes and Deena has dried her… foot (JWoww missed in the alley), the gang decides to go bowling.
Deena - who may or may not have inspired a new “Mario Kart does Jersey Shore” video game with her driving technique - somehow gets everyone (minus Snooks, who stayed home) to the bowling alley safely.
Then Sam, the relationship expert, gives Vinny some advice about how to handle things with Snooki.
Back at the house, Pauly decides it’s time to conquer the upstairs toilet. That is, until he gets a whiff.
“If there’s a plumber in the universe that will face this toilet, they deserve a medal,” Vin says.
Lucky for the housemates, there are two plumbers in the universe who are willing to face their toilet: Rich and Mike.
After finding a pair of underwear, or a T-shirt - or something else really dirty based on the fact that it was bleeped out every time someone said it - in the toilet, the girls assume it belongs to Vin. Interesting considering he was also the first person to try and unclog it. Toilet guilt, Vinny?
Before the rest of the crew gets home from the bar, Team Sober, also known as Ron, Sam and Snooki, decides to pull a prank on The Situation. They take all the cheese in the fridge and put it in his sheets, where he’ll never find it. Gross.
The next morning, Sitch tells everyone about the smelly girl he brought home the night before. She smelled like grated cheese, he said. The only way that conversation would have been more entertaining is if he had identified the cheese smell by specific type. For example: “It smelled like grated parmesan cheese with a hint of cream cheese spread.”
JWoww told him the cheese smell is a sign that his chick had an STD or a yeast infection. She calls a doctor to prove it. Little does he know that the cheese smell can also be a result of evil roommates looking to pull one over on The SNITCHuation.
How does the cheese bed prank compare to the others we’ve seen so far this season? What did you think of last night’s episode?
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