February 16th, 2011
09:46 AM ET
In an emotional new interview with Esquire magazine, Liam Neeson opens up about the tragic death of his wife Natasha Richardson, revealing that he still gets overcome with grief when he least expects it.
"I think I survived by running away some. Running away to work," says Neeson, who shot the thriller "Chloe" after the funeral of Richardson, who died at age 45 from injuries sustained from a March 2009 ski accident.
"I just think I was still in a bit of shock," he says. "But it's kind of a no-brainer to go back to that work. It's a wee bit of a blur, but I know the tragedy hadn't just really smacked me yet."
Now, despite maintaining a full workload, Neeson still occasionally finds himself mourning.
"That's the weird thing about grief," he says. "You can't prepare for it. You think you're gonna cry and get it over with. You make those plans, but they never work. It hits you in the middle of the night — well, it hits me in the middle of the night. I'm out walking. I'm feeling quite content. And it's like suddenly, boom. It's like you've just done that in your chest."
That deep, recurring pain, he says, is "just extraordinary."
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