January 13th, 2011
05:13 PM ET
January 28 marks the third anniversary of Heath Ledger's death, and for Michelle Williams, it's still a huge loss, for herself as well as their 5-year-old daughter, Matilda.
"Very obviously, for me and for her, there's a hole in our life," Williams tells the February issue of Marie Claire. "Of course the natural inclination is to want to fill it and make it disappear, but what I've come to recently is that it's impossible. Nothing will fit in that hole because what we want back we can't get, which is this one person."
Though Williams has had other romances since Ledger unexpectedly died of a drug overdose, she is proceeding with caution.
"I'm not going to rush anything and scamper around like a mad person and make myself crazy. I'm trying to be respectful of the absence," she says. "I'm not trying to fill it up. It is what it is."
Williams's mother, however, wants her to meet someone, and thinks 30-year-old "Blue Valentine" co-star Ryan Gosling — to whom Williams had been romantically linked in the tabloids — would make the perfect partner.
"I think she wanted to believe the Ryan Gosling rumor more than anybody," Williams says. Still, the 30-year-old former "Dawson's Creek" star tells Marie Claire she isn't quite sure that Mr. Right exists.
"The idea that you can get everything you want in one person is destructive, and maybe when you accept that the number is closer to 50 or 60 or 70 percent, that's when you can start to make some progress in choosing the right person," she says.
"I don't want to make a mistake that big, and that saddens me, because it's harder to let yourself go. I can inflict any kind of injury on myself, but with my daughter, that's not an option."
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