October 1st, 2010
01:57 PM ET
The only thing that could have made last night’s episode of “Jersey Shore” more entertaining is if Angelina had packed her clothes in garbage bags a la season one. That way, when she left her luggage outside the house, a garbage truck might have mistook it for trash and swiped it.
But on to what actually happened…
The episode began with The Situation and Angelina’s fight regarding “the situation” she left on the bathroom floor. Despite a shove and some trash talk, the fight ended pretty abruptly.
Pauly tells Angelina that her friend (the random guy she picked up at the beach) shouldn’t be present for “family business.” She insisted he stay, but he seemed much more into Pauly’s idea. He headed for the door, quickly reeling off his phone number. But after seeing Angelina’s used feminine hygiene product and hearing about how many guys she’d been with, there’s a good chance that wasn’t his direct line.
In a weak moment, JWoww feels sorry for Angelina and tries to convince her to stick it out.
And then… another rendition of T-shirt time. When will these be available on iTunes?
Then it’s off to the club, and The Situation invites Samantha - the Canadian hottie he misplaced last episode - to come with. But before they leave, Sitch lays down the law.
“I let her know, ‘listen baby, you know you’re sleeping over tonight. What type of pajams you want?’ ” Yes, he said pajams.
After a fun-filled night on the town, The Situation and Samantha head home to… get to know each other better. The other roommates get to know her pretty well, too. Thin walls.
The next morning, Vinny and Pauly make egg sandwiches and hassle Samantha to give them all the dirty details. “It’s just us girls,” Vinny jokes.
A “serious GTL session” ensues. Although before they could get their GTL on, they had to solve the mystery of the smelly Escalade. The smell? Angelina’s cheese sandwich, which Ronnie says smells a lot like Snooki’s vomit. Yuck.
“Angelina probably left the Swiss cheese in the car because we all know that rats love cheese,” The Situation said.
Sadly, Snooki wasn’t present for the first 30 minutes of last night’s episode, but she more than made up for it in the second half.
At the gelato shop, Snooks compiled a checklist of qualities she would like in a man.
“What I would love to find is a Guido juicehead with my personality and my style. Can I find that somewhere? Because I’m not going on Match.com again,” she says.
The qualities? Someone who fist pumps, frolics, likes pickles and sleeping in, is a nympho and "romantical."
But where will Snooki ever find such a gem? The Ed Hardy store! (JWoww agrees.)
Back at the house - pre-T-shirt time - The Situation invites Angelina out, despite the fact that she hadn’t yet apologized for sleeping in his bed with Jose. She declines.
“Yo, my V-neck isn’t getting any fresher. It’s actually losing quality,” Vinny says.
And they’re off.
At the club, Rocio and Pauly decide to spend as much time together as possible before he heads back to the shore. Snooki searches for a man to take home, but with no gorilla juiceheads in sight, she settles for Angelina’s ex-fling Alex.
As the roommates arrive home, they see Angelina’s luggage outside. It’s official, she’s leaving… again. But not without a bang: Angelina calls Snooki out when she walks in holding Alex’s hand.
“I can’t stand any of yous,” Angelina screams.
Then, Snooki takes her giant hoop earrings out and pounces on Ang in a distinctly Discovery Channel fashion.
Unlike the last few fights that we weren't able to see play out until the following week, MTV threw us a bone, airing the entire brawl in one episode.
JWoww pulled Angelina off Snooki, but, within seconds, they were back at it.
“It’s like beating up a baby,” Ron said, commenting on Snooki’s tiny Tyrannosaurus Rex arms.
The fight ends and Angelina dashes for the door. “Yo, you look like you’re 40. Get some (expletive) Botox,” she yells at The Situation before leaving the house.
Everybody seemed happy to say goodbye to the Staten Island Dump. The girls are excited for no drama, Vinny is excited to move into the boys’ room and The Situation is just excited.
What did you think of last night’s episode?
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