'Jersey Shore' comes to blows
September 3rd, 2010
02:31 PM ET

'Jersey Shore' comes to blows

Remember the days when “Real World” cast members were immediately escorted off set if they laid a hand on one of their housemates? Or, at the very least, the crew would intervene and help break up the fight.

Well, those days are over.

Last night’s episode opened as Snooki embarked on her quest to find the perfect bed to cuddle in - it was basically "Goldilocks" meets “Jersey Shore.” After testing out all the guys’ beds, she finally settled on Vinny’s, which was just right. One thing led to another and…well, we think you can figure out what happened next.

Later, post-hangover, Snooki, Angelina and Jwoww head to the beach. Sammi stays home because she’s not feeling well/she can’t leave her bed for more than five minutes at a time.

At the beach, Jwoww hates on Sammi for having low self-esteem because she’s willing to take Ronnie back after all the wool he pulled over her eyes, figuratively speaking. (But didn't Jwoww’s boyfriend take her back after she cheated on him during season one? I don’t recall her telling her boyfriend that he had low self-esteem. To be clear, I am not a proponent of Sammi taking Ronnie back, just Jwoww shutting her mouth.)

(Another side note: Jwoww, I mean no disrespect. Please don’t beat me up.)

After a quick commercial break, Snooki, Jwoww and Angelina gather outside to talk about Sammi… again. When Snooki decides she can no longer live with the guilt of lying to Sam about the note, she sends Angelina inside to find her.

Sammi, however, is not happy that the girls sent Angelina inside to play messenger, so she doesn’t go. This prompts Jwoww to go off on her. I wish I could give you a word-for-word account of Jwoww’s monologue, but 95 percent of what was said would translate to [expletive] on CNN.com.

On another note, Vinny decided to see an optometrist about a pain in his eye. After having pinkeye during season one, he figured he should probably get it checked out sooner rather than later. Pauly D went with him for moral support.

“You know what I think it is,” Pauly D said. “Honestly, your eyebrows are so bushy that they collect so much more bacteria than normal eyes would.”

Later, at the club, The Situation spots a “blonde-headed girl.” They hit it off. (Surprise, surprise.) In the cab on the way home, The Situation said she showed him how smart she was. “The brains on that girl … she definitely went to college,” he said.

Then, the funniest part of last night’s episode:

Upon returning home, The Situation realized he wasn’t "ready to perform" just yet. “I’m like a Ferrari,” he said. “I’m high maintenance.” So he leaves his new friend in his bedroom and heads into the kitchen to make himself something to eat. After a fourth meal and a smoke, he heads back into his room. “Are you ready for this?” he asks.

Now, the tricky part…

How to kick the girl out, without actually kicking her out: “Um… so, um… I, ugh… I got a taxi for you, baby.”

“And that’s how you get ‘em out,” he boasts.

Perfection.

In the morning, Snooki calls her ex-boyfriend, the chef, to get a recipe for penne a la vodka. It’s the girls’ turn to make dinner.

When Snooki and Jwoww get home from the grocery store, Jwoww gets mad that Sammi isn’t pulling her weight in the kitchen. Sam then decides not to eat Jwoww’s pasta “on purpose” so as not to eliminate the tension.

Later, The Situation’s sister came over to visit her big brother… and his roommate Vinny, whom she became very well acquainted with when she visited during season one. Vinny put on his new bling, which he compared to Jwoww’s breasts - it’s not real but it looks good, or something like that - in preparation.

At the club, Vinny and Mini-Situation, as I’ve decided to name her, aren’t the only two who hit it off. The Situation makes a special friend of his own. Unfortunately for him, his friend turns out to be a transvestite. Moving on…

Angelina and Pauly D made-out in the cab on the way home, but only because Pauly is absolutely inebriated. We know this because his hair was out of place, and, like Ronnie said, Pauly’s hair is never out of place.

Upon returning home, Jwoww calls her boyfriend to say goodnight and mentions that Pauly D got drunk at the club. Angelina, the drama-magnet that she is, told the roommates Jwoww was talking smack about Pauly. Vinny, who happened to hear Jwoww’s conversation firsthand, calls Angelina out before telling Jwoww what was said about her. Good work, Vinny; you're responsible for what ensued.

In an effort to end the argument between Jwoww and Angelina, Sammi got in on the conversation, saying the pair should let it go. Bad move. In that moment, it’s as if Jwoww completely forgot about Angelina.

Long story short, Jwoww grabs Sam’s head and knocks her to the ground. The last thing we saw before the credits was Sammi getting up and charging at Jwoww with her fist at the ready. Why does Thursday have to be so far away?!

What did you think of last night’s episode?

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Filed under: Jersey Shore • television • TV recaps

soundoff (32 Responses)
  1. colton browder

    hey hey hey ....... don't hate on jersey shore ohh yaa pauly D is what the people at my school call me my hair is never out of place yuh digg .... lol yuh so don't hate on it cause u aint got it lol yoyoyoyoyo

    October 11, 2010 at 9:08 pm | Report abuse |
  2. Alden Pulver

    Donald Pulver is the real hero!

    September 19, 2010 at 6:09 pm | Report abuse |
  3. Arnold East Jr.

    Stay Focused and Golden Kids!

    September 19, 2010 at 6:09 pm | Report abuse |
  4. 18 Sunset Drive

    Wondefrul new show about winners.

    September 19, 2010 at 2:06 am | Report abuse |
  5. David & Myrna Band/Sarasota Florida (Siesta Key)

    A World Class show, we just dig it.

    September 19, 2010 at 2:05 am | Report abuse |
  6. Bolton Scharfberg /Scarsdale New York

    Great Storyline, with lots of fun.

    September 19, 2010 at 2:04 am | Report abuse |
  7. Rabbi Huckleman

    Great shows require producers to AMP the storyline a bit.

    September 19, 2010 at 2:03 am | Report abuse |
  8. victoria

    sammie got beat up :)

    September 10, 2010 at 10:56 am | Report abuse |
  9. Hotmama42

    I think this show is so funny. My son and I watch it every Thursday evening and we just LOL for a full how. Snooki is so small that during last night's episode we kept wondering where she was until finally we saw part of her head (thank goodness for that poof). The scene where the girls were cleaning house was just hillarious especially when Snooki remaked that she had never made a bed in her life. What this girl's is about 20-25 and can't make a bed??????? to Snooki's Mom: quit being a maid to this girl.

    September 10, 2010 at 10:45 am | Report abuse |
  10. vicktory allen

    Oh I take back everything I said about vinny in my last blog! Go Vinny for bringin to light angelinas snake ways! Go Jenny for b**** slappin Sammie! How stupid to get mad at the bearer of bad news I.e."The note". But what can you expect.Does she really think she won that fight? Jenny kicked her butt puhlease. People were grabbing jenny and so sam took a cheap shot. She got whooped and that's that. I hate that girl!

    September 9, 2010 at 10:09 pm | Report abuse |
  11. vicky allen

    Jenny is the prettiest girl on js and snookis the funniest and most down to earth. Sammy is a b-wannabbe and I've never been so pleased to see someone get smacked. Angelina and her would get along as they are both needy sad basketcases who are clueless to how pathetic they look. All the guys are stars except Ronnie who needs to go back to the construction site and vinny is obviously a jealous hater. I can't stand it when he puts the girls doiwn as he's probably still a virgin and couldn't catch a girl half as hot as any of them! Well maybe now he could catch a groupie who would pretend he's mike or pauly. I love the majority of these people and hope it stays an air another 5 years!

    September 9, 2010 at 9:56 pm | Report abuse |
  12. meme

    @Chriss,Lombardo,AL031 and Eric,thank you so much for your comments.They have made this day even better,gave me a good laugh.And for all those who think that everyone in the world will think badly of Americans because of this,is not really true.I know that not all Americans are like this(I'm South African).But you guys sure do have the best trashy reality shows,its all in the name of fun.My personal favourites are The Jersey Shore(of course)Flavor of Love and Rock of love.Now that right there is the trifecta.So thank you America.

    September 6, 2010 at 9:07 am | Report abuse |
  13. LadyL

    I think it is awesome that the primary American shows I can view here overseas have been the Jersey Shore and Flava of Love. No wonder everybody hates us.

    September 6, 2010 at 3:36 am | Report abuse |
  14. Bwoww

    people actually watch this tripe?

    September 5, 2010 at 11:33 pm | Report abuse |
  15. Drew

    I used to bash the show till my girl convinced me to watch it with her once, now it cracks me up. Its humanity and stupidity (which I think ate one in the same) at its most raw, to think people are really THAT dumb and clueless in life is both scary cause its true and scary cause its actually a hit series, yet...the cast, as well as paris hilton, the gosselins, lohan...all of the reality "stars" are laughing their way str8 to the bank...makes me wonder who the REAL dummy is...me or sammi.

    September 5, 2010 at 3:37 pm | Report abuse |
  16. joe

    Lets face it. Snooki is a disgusting pig.

    September 5, 2010 at 11:01 am | Report abuse |
  17. Chriss

    I can not stand this show & I watch it !! The show I love to hate - Snooki is so little - half little person,half normal size,what a freak & JWOW - lady is a dude

    September 4, 2010 at 8:20 am | Report abuse |
  18. Kriss

    Snooki's fugly!!!! She thinks her sh-t doesn't stink but I bet her farts give it away. Ewwww, she's sooooo gross!!! FUGLY!!!

    September 4, 2010 at 4:26 am | Report abuse |
  19. babybackbs

    these fake tanned warthogs make me want to spew into a bowl and feed it to my dogs. some one needs to check some green cards and have these guys depoted

    September 3, 2010 at 10:49 pm | Report abuse |
  20. Lombardo

    I have no clue about the story, but the chick in the green makes me think of another meaning of "comes to blows"

    September 3, 2010 at 5:49 pm | Report abuse |
  21. Tattorey

    I hate myself for being addicted to this show!! WHOOO HOOO GO Vinny! and we all thought he was the quiet one. HA!

    September 3, 2010 at 5:09 pm | Report abuse |
  22. T-bone

    what about the "watermelon in the pin hole" comment from Snooki. Vinny's a legend now

    September 3, 2010 at 4:22 pm | Report abuse |
  23. SnookiDrinks/SmeelsLikeAFish

    I would be embarrassed to live in New Jersey.

    September 3, 2010 at 4:15 pm | Report abuse |
  24. Eric

    As a 24 year old Jersey shore guy I'm both offended and perplexed by how MTV can have a show called "Jersey Shore" that is filled with Staten Islanders (NYC) and is filmed in Miami.

    How about they remake Laguna Beach but film it in Cancun with a bunch of Puerto Ricans.

    September 3, 2010 at 4:01 pm | Report abuse |
    • ALo31

      I agree!! And when are these people going to act their age? Isn't JWOW pushing 40 or something? ;D Trash. And they bring a bad image to my people. Hoping they'll be gone soon.

      September 3, 2010 at 4:36 pm | Report abuse |
  25. crystal burger

    Ii was very very very entertained and i wish that people would just enjoy reality tv and stop taking it so seriously and trying to analyze everything about it...dang it is just TV!
    cant wait to watch it next thursday...

    September 3, 2010 at 3:44 pm | Report abuse |
    • Sebastian

      Don't take reality TV seriously?? Really? That's like saying, "That was a funny drama movie." These people are an embarrassment to America, not just New Jersey. Typically the only thing other countries really see about America is what gets put on tv. These people should not be on TV. But, I don't watch it so whatever.

      September 5, 2010 at 6:51 pm | Report abuse |
  26. CGI

    hahaha good episode

    September 3, 2010 at 3:26 pm | Report abuse |
  27. Lynne

    They're all an embarassment. Thank God they don't represent the Real Jersey Shore. Heck, they're not even from NJ!!

    September 3, 2010 at 3:17 pm | Report abuse |
    • Anne

      Isn't there anything better in the world to talk about or write about than a TV show that is founded on a bunch of losers? I have never seen the show, somehow just got onto this internet site and read the review and realized that I am thankful that I don't waste my precious time on this earth watching this garbage. Your lives must really suck!

      September 6, 2010 at 3:37 am | Report abuse |
    • tania

      wow whateverr helloo shows are always drama so sometimes u just have to deal whit it if u dont like it then dont see itt .! whitout drama noo laughing lol.!

      September 6, 2010 at 10:14 am | Report abuse |

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