Robert Rodriguez’s much-hyped “Machete” may have started out as a fake trailer in 2007’s “Grindhouse,” but the full-length feature finally arrives in theaters this weekend.

It stars Danny Trejo as the weapon-wielding Machete who finds himself seeking a violent justice after he gets caught up in an assassination plot meant to further a Texas senator's anti-immigration agenda. Michelle Rodriguez plays a taco-truck driving revolutionary; Jessica Alba takes a turn as a U.S. customs officer; and Lindsay Lohan also makes an appearance that we hear is mainly in the nude.

So if you’re the type of person who’s been anticipating this movie all along anyway, we doubt the reviews, good or bad, are going to change your mind. But if you’re still undecided on how badly you want to see what the fuss is about, the main question you need to ask is this: Can you stand some serious gore?

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In the latest reports from Billboard, Chris Brown’s newest single, “Deuces,” is the No. 1 song on the R&B/Hip-Hop chart. An ode to saying goodbye to a former lover, “Deuces” features Tyga and Kevin McCall, and marks Brown’s first time at the top since 2006.

Brown’s last two stints atop the R&B/Hip-Hop chart were 2005’s “Run It!” and “Say Goodbye” the next year. This is obviously great news for Brown, who saw his career suffer after his domestic abuse incident with ex-girlfriend Rihanna. Brown’s last album, “Graffiti,” sold only 319,000 units according to Nielsen SoundScan.

For Brown, the news of his No. 1 song comes right after he and his co-stars from the heist flick “Takers” found out they were at the top of the box office, just edging out “The Last Exorcism.”

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Ready for another round of weeklies cheat sheet? You're going to need something to keep you occupied as you head to your respective Labor Day vacation spots - even if that vacation spot will double as your desk at work. (We promise we won't tell!)

This week, the young mothers from MTV's hit "Teen Mom" make numerous appearances on the celebrity weeklies, proving that readers are willing to shell out newsstand price to know more.

In other news, Brad Pitt has brought his sexy back, although we weren't really aware that it left; "Real Housewives" star Teresa Giudice shows you how to blow $11 million; and People has an exclusive with Michael Douglas.

Discovery Communications employees are slowly trying to find their way back to normalcy.

THR reported that Discovery’s building was open for business Thursday, a day after a hostage crisis erupted at the Silver Spring, Maryland, edifice, but Discovery spokeswoman Tammy Shea adds that employees have been encouraged to use the holiday weekend as a time for healing.

“Right now we are wholly focused on the recovery and healing of our employees with counselors available, and we’ve told them to take today through the holiday weekend off to focus on that and to be with their families,” she told CNN. “We will get back in the saddle on Tuesday, and we’ll still have counselors on hand to help everyone recover.”

What a week it’s been for celebrity mug shots.

First we got to take a look back at all three of Paris Hilton’s booking photos, and today, thanks to the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department, we also have the opportunity to take a gander at what rapper T.I. (real name: Clifford Harris) and his wife, Tameka “Tiny” Cottle, looked like the night of their arrest.

The couple was released on $10,000 bail Thursday morning. A spokeswoman for the Sheriff’s Department, Nicole Nishida, told CNN that their mug shots wouldn’t be made public until investigators confirmed through lab tests that the substance seized at the time of their arrest on Wednesday was an illegal drug.

It hasn't been the best summer for Jay Leno.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, ratings this summer for "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno" have been the lowest on record, and drew smaller numbers among the coveted 18- to 49-year-old demographic than when Conan O’Brien hosted the show.

Since the end of the broadcast season, Leno has been averaging 3.8 million viewers and a 1.0 adults 18-49 rating, which is a 12 percent improvement in total audience compared with O'Brien’s performance but 23 percent less in the targeted demographic, according to THR. Those numbers also represent a decrease in both ratings stats compared with Leno's performance two years ago.

Yet even with the reduced numbers, Leno still beat his main rival - CBS' "Late Show With David Letterman.”

He may not have been able to keep his own daughter out of trouble, but Lindsay Lohan's dad Michael Lohan is hoping to help others by opening a faith-based rehab facility in L.A.

"I know this is what God wants me to do first and foremost," 50-year-old Lohan, who has also battled drugs and alcohol, tells Us Weekly. "After seeing what my daughter, myself, and other people I know have been through, it has led me to realize this is my calling and purpose in life."

The center will not have doctors or conduct medical treatments but will instead be a spiritual retreat, focusing on mind, body and soul, and including activities such as yoga and kickboxing.

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Remember the days when “Real World” cast members were immediately escorted off set if they laid a hand on one of their housemates? Or, at the very least, the crew would intervene and help break up the fight.

Well, those days are over.

Last night’s episode opened as Snooki embarked on her quest to find the perfect bed to cuddle in - it was basically "Goldilocks" meets “Jersey Shore.” After testing out all the guys’ beds, she finally settled on Vinny’s, which was just right. One thing led to another and…well, we think you can figure out what happened next.

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In an interview with Empire magazine, the three stars of “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows” – Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson, who play Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, respectively – opened up about filming, friendships and finally finishing 10 years of hard work. (Oh, and that highly-anticipated kiss scene.)

“Deathly Hollows,” Watson explained to the U.K. publication, is a far cry from the first six movies in the series. First, it’s split into two parts and took 18 months to shoot. Second, it’s much more emotional.

“The emotional stuff is much harder,” Watson told Empire. “These last two films have been on a completely different level in terms of what they’ve demanded from me physically and emotionally.”

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Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen may have said bye-bye to the big screen, but their baby sister is just getting started.

Twenty-one-year-old Elizabeth Olsen has landed a starring role opposite English hunk Hugh Dancy in the upcoming indie drama "Martha Marcy May Marlene." She'll play a young woman who goes to live with her big sister and her husband (Dancy) after escaping a cult, according to The Hollywood Reporter.

While the 24-year-old former "Full House" stars continue to focus on their careers as successful clothing designers, Elizabeth - whose earliest acting gig was the 1994 Olsen twins TV flick "How the West Was Fun" - has been busy racking up movie roles.

Besides "Martha Marcy May Marlene," she recently filmed the comedy "Peace, Love & Misunderstanding" alongside an impressive cast that includes Jane Fonda, Catherine Keener, Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Chace Crawford.