Cheaters always win on the 'Jersey Shore'
August 20th, 2010
02:15 PM ET

Cheaters always win on the 'Jersey Shore'

I wish Ronnie and Sammi could just make it work. Not because I particularly care about their happiness, or because I think they’re good for one another. I’d just prefer that they stop hogging the precious 40 to 42 minutes I get to spend with the cast each week.

As usual, last night’s episode started up where the last one left off. Ronnie, MVP and Angelina were at the club, while Sammi, Snooki and JWoww waited up at home.

Snooki decided to call her boyfriend Emilio. Somehow, this conversation was even more entertaining than their last – when Snooki hung up on him mid-sentence err, hiccup, to go spoon with Vinny.

He answered: “There’s half-naked girls everywhere. Whatever, bye.”

But rather than sulking, Snooki, the mature woman that she is, dealt with the situation in a more refined manner – by smashing dishes and enlightening viewers by saying that guys don’t know how to deal with women. "I feel that’s why the lesbian rate is going up in this country,” she added.

Then, rather than letting Snooki have her moment, Sammi asks the girls if they think Ronnie is cheating on her. Umm… YES! Though they deny having any knowledge of Ron’s escapades, Snooki offers what might be the most down-to-earth piece of advice ever uttered by an MTV reality star: “If he wanted to stay with you and snuggle, he would have. But he didn’t.”

When Angelina and the boys get home they see broken dishes outside. Ron – always the perceptive drunk – thinks they may be the result of Sammi’s anger toward him. He makes a bee line for his bed and hits the sheets.

Sammi then tells Ronnie she was testing him when she said he could go out earlier that night. Ronnie’s response: “I don’t like tests. That’s why I didn’t go to college.” Are we all in agreement that this episode was absolutely brimming with quotable one-liners?

Though it was just a small part of the episode, the scene where the guys were cooking/dropping dinner was pretty hilarious.

After they eat, the gang gathers in the living room to play a 20 questions-like game. Of course, they had to put their own “Jersey Shore” spin on it, which is why the girls changed into their sexy lingerie beforehand.

After noticing that Angelina’s getup could easily pass for a garbage bag – aka her luggage from season one – Vinny let out another gem: “I think Victoria should have kept this one a secret,” he said.

A little later, the crew heads to the club. By this point in the episode, Ronnie and Sammi have already broken up about 10 different times, and Sammi has said she’s “done” with Ronnie about 27 different times.

When they got home, Sammi put a pot from the kitchen beside Ronnie’s bed in case he needed to throw up. Gross.

The second funniest part of the episode – after hearing Snooki’s slimy ex confess to cheating on her in the same nonchalant way you might tell someone you were running late to meet them for coffee – was when Vinny and Pauly D were spitting game in the gelato shop.

“He spoons, I fork,” Pauly D said.

The episode ends after Snooki and JWoww pen a grammatically incorrect, anonymous account of Ronnie’s bad behavior. I can’t wait for Sammi to read this.

What did you think of last night’s episode?

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Filed under: Jersey Shore • TV recaps

soundoff (7 Responses)
  1. D

    yeah Mike what a waste of time... but you seem to care enough to go to the ENTERTAINMENT blog, select this story, read it, and respond...

    August 22, 2010 at 5:20 pm | Report abuse |
  2. Eileen

    The Butterface comment was my favorite part of the show. Also when Ronnie said something like "Don't test me, cause I'll always fail."

    I did not enjoy this week's episode as much as the other weeks because there was WAAAY too much time given to Ronnie and Sammi. They are being waaay too melodramatic and it's no longer entertaining. It's not as if the other housemates aren't doing enough amusing things to fill up the episode each week, so I wish MTV would just cut out all the Sammi and Ronnie crap. I'm over it. GIVE ME MORE SNOOKI!

    August 21, 2010 at 11:46 am | Report abuse |
  3. Mike

    What a waste of time to even CARE what these pitifulexcuses for people do or feel. It is all about ratings and money. Anyone who thinks that even a small part of this is real needs to have their head examined. The only thing it is good for is to help normal everyday people feel better about themselves.

    August 21, 2010 at 11:41 am | Report abuse |
  4. Rachel

    I think the other good quote came from Vinny at the ice cream shop: "I don't think we servce Butterface here"

    August 21, 2010 at 11:15 am | Report abuse |
  5. Shirt before the shirt

    "we have an abundance of white and black tank tops, and we sit on the couch until its t shirt time"

    August 20, 2010 at 3:56 pm | Report abuse |
  6. EasyE

    "I got my fresh to def kicks ooon. I got some jeans oooon. And I got the shirt, before the shirt."

    August 20, 2010 at 3:38 pm | Report abuse |
  7. Dani Girl

    At first I felt sorry for Sammi, then as time went on I laugh in her general direction. How stupid can she be?? He does not want to be with her, but yet she keeps the relationship going because of "love". If calling a girl a "b1tch" is love, then I've been doing this all wrong!! And yeah I agree, stop hogging up the entire show!! Break up already I want equal time with all of my guido's and guidette's!

    August 20, 2010 at 2:57 pm | Report abuse |

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