August 2nd, 2010
10:41 AM ET
Editor’s Note: This post contains spoilers for the Sunday, August 1 episode of HBO’s “True Blood.”
Okay, how crazy was "True Blood" last night? The emotion! The blood! The body count!
This week, we said goodbye to a couple of old friends, and unfortunately, Lorena was the first to go. Sookie staked her as a dying Bill restrained her. Farewell, Lorena! I was really hoping we’d get a chance to learn more about your history, so I’m sorry to see you go!
Sookie, aided by Tara and Alcide, scrambled to remove Bill from Russell’s property. Debbie, who becomes more and more disheveled with each episode, soon discovered them and briefly held the group at gunpoint.
Coot soon joined them, because the old slave quarters was evidently the place to be. Alcide, having recovered the gun from a distracted Debbie, did away with Coot in short order. Au revoir, Coot! I’ll miss your abs. Anyhow, a whole bunch of screaming followed and Debbie vowed to hunt Alcide down. And you know what? I don’t doubt it. It’s gonna get ugly, y’all!
The gang sped away from Jackson, leaving a pack of angry, naked werewolves in their wake. Alcide and Tara later discovered Sookie was nearly drained dry in the back of the getaway box van. Tara, who by this time was so totally over her trip to Mississippi, ordered a recovered but confused Bill out into the sunlight. The sunlight, you say? But that’s impossible! Ah, but it is. What is it about that sweet, sweet Stackhouse blood?
Doctors’ attempts to treat Sookie failed as she lapsed into a coma after her body rejected a blood transfusion. Why? It turns out, SHE DOESN’T HAVE A BLOOD TYPE. Tara was instructed to notify Sookie’s next of kin, and Jason and Lafayette soon arrived at the hospital.
Then it got corny. I’m as big a fan of this show as anyone, but come on. A glimpse into Sookie’s near-death experience resembled one of Maryann’s get-togethers from last season with the Double Rainbow guy as the party planner.
There was dancing, plus something about a magic pond. We also met (yet another!) new character named Claudine, who invited Sookie to join her by way of the aforementioned magic pond. Our tolerating this scene was rewarded with an interesting tidbit of information about Sookie’s past. Remember Sookie’s parents? Not killed by a flash flood as we’d been led to believe.
Before Sookie could find out anymore about her parents, a dark cloud settled over her dream – just as Bill appeared in her hospital room in real time. Back in the dream, Claudine warned Sookie that Bill would ‘steal her light,’ whatever the heck that means. She then disappeared into the radiant depths of the magic pond, leaving Sookie all alone in the Bon Temps cemetery.
Jason permitted Bill to give Sookie his blood in an attempt to revive her, and Bill held vigil by her bedside until she came to and began screaming. That’s no way to thank a fellow for saving your life, Sook!
Sam, meanwhile, set out to infiltrate the dog-fighting ring he suspected Tommy of being forced to compete in. Truth? This whole storyline makes my stomach turn because it’s just so awful to think about. But, for now, at least, there seems to be a happy ending.
After he was turned away at the gate, Sam gained entry to the event by shifting into a pit bull. Upon shifting back into human form, he overpowered one of the no-good dog handlers, freed all of the captive dogs and broke up Tommy’s fight right in the nick of time. Did anybody else cheer? Because I did…and I may have even teared up a little.
After giving Joe Lee and Melinda a piece of his mind, Sam took the injured Tommy away and vowed to give him a better life.
Old Jason continued to pine for Crystal and took Hoyt’s advice to question the incarcerated T-Dub for information. T-Dub, as you may remember, is the drug dealer Jason busted in Hotshot several episodes ago. T-Dub admitted to Jason that Crystal was his cousin but refused to offer up any more information until Jason procured him some methamphetamine. So we lost a Coot but gained us a T-Dub; who says prayers go unanswered?
In New Orleans, Eric continued with his plot to seek vengeance against Russell by drawing him closer. Eager to find out why everyone is so interested in Sookie, he threatened Queen Sophie-Anne – imprisoned in a darling life-sized birdcage – with the life of her companion, Sookie’s cousin Hadley.
The Queen refused to spill any secrets, but Hadley was more than willing to share what she knew. She told Eric that she was Sookie’s cousin and then whispered Sookie’s secret into his ear. Funny how it appears that Sookie will be the last to know what makes her so special.
Back at Fangtasia, the Magister continued to use the bar’s dungeon as his own Little Shop of Horrors. Just as he was on the verge of doing more unspeakably horrible things to Pam, Eric arrived with Sophie-Anne and Russell in tow.
Eric got the Magister up to speed with where his loyalties currently lay and Russell appraised him of his intent to marry Sophie-Anne. The Magister refused to unite the couple, citing his loyalty to the Authority. (Who is the Authority, anyway? I kind of hope it’s Nan Flanagan.)
Things did not end well for the Magister. Though he ultimately married the King and Queen, a power-mad Russell decapitated him, dropping jaws in both Fangtasia’s basement and in my living room. Via con dios, Magister. You were despicable, but deliciously so.
What’d you all think of last night’s episode?
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