June 15th, 2010
03:25 PM ET

Cameron Diaz: I'm not ready to be a mother

Getting older when you’re an actress is often considered to be a negative thing, but Cameron Diaz, 37, doesn't see it that way.

"The experience of growing older is that you become more introspective. You learn who you are and what you want. When you're in your 20s, you have no idea what the hell's going on or who you are or how the world works,” the actress told InStyle magazine in its July issue.

“Wisdom is really underrated. We are obsessed with youth, with physical youth, what we look like and what happens to our bodies as we get older. We forget what happens to our souls, our minds, and our actual human experience."

Speaking of human experiences, here’s one Diaz said she’s not quite ready for: motherhood.

“I’m not opposed to it happening,” she told InStyle, but “having children changes your life drastically, and I really love my life. Children aren’t the only things that bring you gratification and happiness, and it’s easier to give life than to give love. So I don’t know. That kind of change would have to be either very well thought out, or a total mistake - a real oops!”

Diaz, who landed at number 37 on last year's Maxim Hot 100 list, said she isn’t one to shy away from a sweat session, adding that she’ll play just about any sport. “I snowboard and ski and run and work out with my trainer … as much as possible."

But does she play baseball? There have been rumors attaching Diaz to New York Yankees shortstop Alex Rodriguez, but if she is, she’s not one to kiss and tell.

“It’s one thing when I answer questions for myself - it’s another thing when I answer questions and someone else is involved," she said. "It’s not fair to the other people in that equation.”

Read the full interview with Diaz in the July issue of InStyle, on sale Friday, June 18.


soundoff (38 Responses)
  1. Stacy

    I admire Ms. Diaz for not wanting to have kids. It's true that they totally change your life and it seems she loves the way her life as it is now. A lot of people have children for the wrong reasons, or don't really comprehend how much it can turn your life upside down. At least Ms. Diaz is self-aware and honest with herself and is responsible enough to not bring a child into the world when there is the possibility she would resent its existence. Too many children are currently neglected (emotionally) in the world.

    Although I have to disagree that people in their 20's don't know what's going on around them or how the world works as Ms. Diaz states. I'm a 30-something, but I know many 20-somethings that are responsible, self-aware and involved with the world around them, much more so than many other folks I know that are older than myself. Ms. Diaz may have had her issues during her 20's and continuing into her 30's, but that is certainly no reason to assume that's the way every person in that age group thinks or behaves. But the fact of the matter is: Cameron Diaz just isn't that bright and is unable to fathom that.

    July 24, 2010 at 10:59 pm | Report abuse |
  2. Hydee

    What is so selfish about not having kids when you don't want them?? Is there some mandate that I didn't know about? Better compare that to the ever-so-noble and selfless gesture of getting pregnant to,"Snare a man that is losing interest in you" lol!!!!!!

    July 12, 2010 at 1:06 pm | Report abuse |
  3. Joe

    tick tock tick tock

    The sound of the baby factory it goes.

    June 24, 2010 at 6:16 pm | Report abuse |
  4. dimarco

    why is it that people are considered selfish if they don't want children? Too many people ARE having children for their own selfish reasons. I applaud Cameron for taking the time to think out thoughtfully whether or not she is ready for parenthood; not everyone is cut out to be a parent and it is a beautiful thing when one realizes their limitations.

    June 24, 2010 at 4:00 pm | Report abuse |
  5. mark honaker

    Alex Rodriguez plays 3rd base, not shortstop. That's Derek Jeter's position.

    June 24, 2010 at 2:17 pm | Report abuse |
  6. Jack Meoff

    [youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7128qEAUeOA&w=640&h=360]

    June 23, 2010 at 8:16 pm | Report abuse |
  7. Angel Eyes

    I am sixty two and have had children. If I had it to do over. Nope ! There is no way, I would sign up for this job again.
    It is Thankless, they are selfish, and I feel like I threw my Life away by having them.

    Bravo for Camera for having the where with all to know herself as well as she does. Not everyone was meant to procreate.

    June 17, 2010 at 12:32 pm | Report abuse |
    • Thankful

      What you said is so sad. Children are a blessing–remember that you should be thankful for them. While there are things I sometimes wish I would have done differently, I know my children are the best gift God has ever given me, and there is no way I would ever regret them. God has trusted you with those children–instead of blaming them for your own mistakes, perhaps you should look inward and see what you could have done differently to raise them to be better people. Your children are simply a reflection of you.
      If you can truly say you've done your best, then put their issues at God's feet and pray for them, because no problem is too great or small for the Lord.

      June 17, 2010 at 8:13 pm | Report abuse |
    • cheddar

      @Thankful
      Contrary to popular belief, there are A LOT of women that feel the way Angel Eyes feels and there is nothing wrong with that. You put your all into your children, you do what's best for them and if they turn out opposite to the way you wanted, you have every right to feel that way. I love my kids to death, they turned out fine but if I could do it over, I would NOT have had children. Its knowing who you are and what you want.

      June 18, 2010 at 8:00 am | Report abuse |
    • Emily

      Good for you for being honest! I hope you talk to young women occasionally and tell them there's another way in life besides being a baby oven. Too many young women see marriage and babies as the only thing they should have as a goal.

      By the way, I'm in total agreement with you about kids. I find them really unappealing in general. I don't like the behavior of children lately, I don't like the behavior of their parents, and I don't like the way all of society is expected to revolve around them at every turn.

      June 23, 2010 at 8:20 pm | Report abuse |
    • M

      @Angel Eyes: Good for you for being honest with yourself and for being brave enough to admit that the myths of motherhood did not pan out for you.

      @Thankful: Children are not a blessing for everyone, realize that. I don't see children as a blessing and I am thankful that I won't ever have them. If what you say of children being a reflection of the parents is true...then perhaps your children are judgmental, naive Bible thumpers.

      June 24, 2010 at 5:50 pm | Report abuse |
  8. AJ

    Children may not be for her. I do have two. Love them. My life was different before children and I am 30. She is having a good time. And when she wants to pay for a baby she can.

    June 17, 2010 at 8:42 am | Report abuse |
  9. LGLK

    It's great that she's living life the way she wants to. But I don't understand the term, "not ready." I don't know ANYONE who was, whether 25, 35 or 45. I know people without kids who never wanted any, and that's fine and their choice. But I don't think anyone is ever ready. Also, I disagree about being completely robbed of your freedom when you have kids. Of course it takes a lot to raise them and yes, you have to sacrifice your me time for them. But you could still live your own life and try to make it work, and for many being a parent is rewarding. It's not all about screaming, whining kids! I'd think someone in her position would struggle a little less then, say, the average full time working mom. That said, it looks like she's enjoying her life so more power to her.

    June 16, 2010 at 9:55 am | Report abuse |
  10. Amanda

    Well as a mother in her 20's, it just sounds like she's too selfish to give up her time so it's good she's not having a child any time soon. It's about something bigger than you and obviously, even at almost 40, she's not mature enough for it.

    June 16, 2010 at 8:59 am | Report abuse |
    • cheddar

      As you get only one shot at life, being selfish with one's self is not a bad thing at all. Motherhood is not for everyone and to call someone immature for not being in a hurry to have children, speaks volumes of the mentality of the person saying it. Jealous, much?

      June 16, 2010 at 9:19 am | Report abuse |
    • Jazz

      Choosing not to have children doesn't reflect immaturity. Perhaps selfish, but there's nothing wrong with that either. Diaz is honest, saying what many women are thinking. I'm in my late 20s & have no desire for children because personally I'd like to travel & continue working full-time, a job I love. Kids are a life-long committment. If you're happy without them,why does society view that as negative?

      June 16, 2010 at 9:47 am | Report abuse |
    • HIS WIFE

      I like Cameron but she obviously likes being a free spirt cuz judging from her past relationships she has committment phobia...she cant committ to a man an she admits she cant committ to a child..I have 3 children an swore I was nva gonna have any cuz I loved being a free spirit...but i love my children to death..She may have regrets when she gets older only time will tell when shes old an noone comes to visit her...

      June 16, 2010 at 11:10 am | Report abuse |
    • Emily

      Funny how people with kids always want to make reproducing some enviable position to be bowed down to by everyone. Sounds like you've had a litter before you're 30 and are trying to justify not having done much else.

      June 23, 2010 at 8:16 pm | Report abuse |
    • dimarco

      ridiculous to think that just because someone doesn't want to be a mother that automatically makes them selfish; it's quite the opposite – it makes them wise and they understand their limitations. too many selfish people ARE having children. I was a young mom, and love that I had a child, but I realize and applaud those that may not want the same things in life – good for cameron!

      June 24, 2010 at 3:58 pm | Report abuse |
    • M

      "Motherhood" is not a synonym for "maturity." You don't sound particularly mature, you sound narrowminded and judgmental. Not having children because you don't want them is a selfish choice. I'll agree with you there. But so is having children because you want them. Do you see that the word "want" popped up in both those conflicting sentences? Women, like you, who choose motherhood, don't choose it because they're selfless and noble. The world wouldn't end if you didn't breed. In fact, the world could do with less people having children as overpopulation is very real problem. You made a selfish choice by doing exactly what you WANTED to do. Now grow up and realize that not everyone wants the same things as you, and that doesn't make their life choices inferior to yours.

      June 24, 2010 at 5:46 pm | Report abuse |
    • WhatNoKids?

      I don't understand why Ms. Diaz hasn't had a minimum of 6 kids by now. Any respectable woman her age should understand that women are expected to donate their bodies to science so that they can pop out a few parasites, spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to raise each one from birth until 18, and realize that their free time should be hijacked so that they can breastfeed, go to soccer games, drive to school, plan playdates, have sleepovers, endure the endless crying, go to the doctor, and ultimately have plastic surgery to repair the damage that children have on their bodies. So stop being so selfish, girls, you need to find a man who can support you so that you won't get criticized when you stop working and make a few genetic copies of yourselves.

      For the record me and my husband have been married almost a decade, have been to 10 countries together, and are going to our 11th next week. We're leaving our cat and dog with the "grandparents". The fact that we both are educated and have good jobs means that there's a good chance our next trip will be an adults-only Mediterranean cruise. Can't wait! Cheers! 😉

      June 27, 2010 at 3:58 am | Report abuse |
  11. Lilliane Liyana

    I must aplaude you Cameron...Life is not only about marriage and kids.

    June 16, 2010 at 8:34 am | Report abuse |
  12. Blondie

    Finally, a beautiful Hollywood actress with something very intelligent to say. Very well said Cameron! : )

    Beautiful inside and out....

    June 16, 2010 at 8:01 am | Report abuse |
  13. Laura

    Who is ever really ever "ready" to be a mom ?? However,it is an life changing experience. Cameron is a talented,beautiful actress,down to earth & who does'nt love her as Princess Fiona ??? one day she will be a great mom,she is wise to be honest about it–best wishes !!

    June 16, 2010 at 6:51 am | Report abuse |
    • M

      She "will" be a great mom? Why are you assuming that that's the path she'll choose? People need to understand that for some, that "not wanting to be a mom" feeling doesn't go away. This assumption that all women will eventually cave to motherhood is preposterous. It's as if you live in some suburban bubble and have never heard of anyone not having kids. Try to broaden your perspective.

      June 24, 2010 at 5:42 pm | Report abuse |
  14. Baseball Fan

    The real question is, does the person reporting this play baseball? Alex Rodriguez plays 3rd base for the Yankees not shortstop. Don't try and spread rumors if you can't even keep the content of the rumor straight.

    June 15, 2010 at 11:01 pm | Report abuse |
  15. Jmi

    At least someone is honest enough to say kids may not be for them. I applaud Cameron for being so honest, I am in my thirties and think motherhood may not be for me and people continue to ask. It drives me nuts! I too love my life and the freedom to travel and live my life on my own terms. Thanks Cameron and maybe I'll have the strength to be as openly honest. You are an inspiration!

    June 15, 2010 at 10:28 pm | Report abuse |
  16. Roy Mabe Jr.

    Cameron Diaz doesn't want to be Kate Gosselin and that's fine, that's her choice but most women live to have children , raise families, and live the american dream.

    June 15, 2010 at 7:25 pm | Report abuse |
    • How would you know?

      Roy doesn't sound like a woman's name, so how do you know what most women want? Everybody DOES not want whatever your mother wanted.

      June 16, 2010 at 1:29 am | Report abuse |
    • heather

      Nope, sorry, you are wrong to assume most women "live to have children" and families.... It's assumptions like yours that perpetuate the stigma against single and childless women, who have simply chosen a different lifestyle. Now that women have equal choice and financial opportunity, many many more are choosing independence over the family trap.

      June 17, 2010 at 4:14 pm | Report abuse |
    • southfloridagirl

      Since when is a womans American Dream to get married and have children? We ain't in Kansas anymore and with a name like Roy..you ain't no Dorothy! Very typical of a guy to think that is all "we women" want. We want the freedom to become who we need to be...just like the Roys of the world. That may or may not include children and marriage.

      June 17, 2010 at 9:51 pm | Report abuse |
    • Emily

      Actually fewer and fewer American women are having kids. There are many other things for people to be fulfilled over besides babies. I have none, don't want them, and won't have them. I get tired of people telling me 'at age X, you'll change your mind' even if they just met me. Women aren't just baby factories. I was once told I should have a baby and give it to someone who can't have them if I don't want one myself. Offensive! Diaz has her priorities straight FOR HER and that's terrific. Y'all who want tons of babies, go for it. But don't be judgmental about people who don't want kids.

      June 23, 2010 at 8:13 pm | Report abuse |
    • M

      How would you know what women want? You wouldn't. You are generalizing and stereotyping women. We are not all the same. There are quite a lot of women who never wanted children and there are others who regret having children.

      June 24, 2010 at 5:39 pm | Report abuse |
  17. Samantha

    I love Cameron Diaz, and she is hysterically funny and down-to-earth. I am 36 yrs old, have never been married and have no kids. Although because of her fame and fortune she lives in a way different world than I do, what I can relate to the most about her is people's expectations that you to have all the answers somehow, even in your late thirties. I don't know if motherhood is for me, and marriage is like slowly being suffocated to death. Or at least that's what I've been told. I have the freedom to come and go as I please, and when you're married/have kids, those choices are no longer open to you. You simply have NO choices. I breathe easier everyday knowing I'm not boxed in. And I've been in love with the same guy for 13 yrs now. ...so no I'm not a man hater! Keep Shining Cameron!! :):):)

    June 15, 2010 at 7:17 pm | Report abuse |
  18. Sweet P

    She is so wise!! I wish I had it all together when I was younger.

    June 15, 2010 at 6:56 pm | Report abuse |
  19. China

    Ms. Diaz's quotes really inspired me and held so much truth. I will definitely be picking up that InStyle issue...I think she is a fun and talented actress, I have loved her since 'Something About Mary'. Celebrities have a huge responsibility to be an example to society and Ms. Diaz is a true leader all.

    June 15, 2010 at 4:23 pm | Report abuse |
  20. LBW

    I admire her honesty. She is beautiful and wealthy and she's having a darn good time. Motherhood is like marriage in that it is not for everyone. Not being a mom is better than being a bad mom.

    June 15, 2010 at 4:03 pm | Report abuse |

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