May 25th, 2010
10:13 AM ET
[Editor's Note: You know the drill by now. If you haven't seen the latest episode of "The Bachelorette," DON'T READ ANY FURTHER.]
Earlier this year, Ali Fedotowsky chose working at Facebook over "Bachelor" Jake Pavelka. Now, Ali is ready to put love over job security and a roof over her head.
Host Chris Harrison welcomes us back to the manor, declaring that 25 men from "across America" have gathered to win Ali's hand. Once again, Chris shows a complete lack of geography skills, as three of the contestants are Canadian.
This year's lineup include three Chrises, two Craigs, a Derek, a Derrick, two Johns, a Jonathan and two Tylers. Alas, no one's wearing nametags at the manor.
One bachelor left the limo via the vehicle's sunroof to greet Ali, while another did a backflip off the roof of a second limo. A third actually proposed to Ali outside the manor, but the ring was cubic zirconia and the proposal was for "alone time" with her. A decent consolation prize, but not the real thing.
Another bachelor, Kyle, tried to "reel in" Ali with his invisible fishing pole. Kyle's an outdoorsman from Colorado who says he's looking for an "ice fishing partner" to hang out with. Unfortunately, showing the viewers your collection of animals you killed won't win you brownie points. Threatening to eat the "first impression" rose doesn't help either.
One bachelor to watch is Justin, an "entertainment wrestler" (that's what the show called him, not me) from Canada. He told Ali that when he's in the ring, he's "Rated R" (Adam "Edge" Copeland thinks that's gimmick infringement).
In the end, Ali kept 17 of the 25 gentleman callers. Among those staying are Justin the wrestler (who was nearly voted off by the other bachelors, who claim he's there for the "wrong reasons"), Frank (the guy who left the limo via sunroof) and all three Chrises.
Those sent home include Kyle the outdoorsman and Derrick, a California native whose known to family and friends as "Shooter." How he got that nickname is for reasons that can't be published on a family website. Nevertheless, he explained to Ali the background of that nickname during his one-on-one time. If there were ever a time to present someone with a "last impression" rose, Derrick would fit the bill.
Once again, the premiere ended with a quick preview of what to expect this season. Tempers flare! Fingers are pointed! Volcanoes erupt, both figuratively and literally!
What did you think of "The Bachelorette" premiere?
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