Comments on: David Foster Wallace, 1962-2008

By: pertuchio

pertuchio — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 16:10:10 +0000

Suicide is never easy on the family of those left behind. It stigmatizes the living for the rest of thier lives unless they are able to come to terms with it. There are two types of suicide. One is caused by the imbalance of chemicals that causes depression which is a severe disease in this country which again places a "stigma" with the bearer. Those who choose to end their own lives due to depression are not in control of what they do. Their reasoning functions of the brain are not working correct. Being a spiritual person, I have to beleive that this type of suicide does not equal eternal damnation. The other suicide i believe is just a selfish way of getting out of a life they no longer feel is fair or do not wan to cope with the day to day life. This will lead to everlasting pain in hell. I have a friend that killed himslef one night, I had no idea he was having mental problems, or that life was being unfair to him. I wish I knew. I feel like I could have helped him.

Judge not so quickly less ye be judged unfairly. Keep that in mind the next time you open your mouth and spout judgment on others Violet. I feel you may have had this happen in your life. You may yourself one day or lonely night looking down the barrel of a gun and wonder "How did I get here? When you pull the trigger, you will find final judgement. Are you ready?

By: revolted by violet

revolted by violet — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 19:21:59 +0000

I lost my husband and the father of my only child to suicide. Just over three months ago he shot himself in the head in front of me in our bedroom. He suffered with depression for many years and had other health issues. He could not find peace in this life and so chose to leave it behind. As much as I have been able to cope with the devastation in my life, the hardest thing for me is still telling others who did not know us how he died. There is a ridiculous stigma surrounding suicide and it is unfortunate because I find myself essentially lying when asked about it. People constantly are asking this or that about my husband in passing, unaware of my circumstances. I usually let people think it was an accident because people would just assume that my husband was constantly miserable or that I must have been a horrible wife for him to leave me in such a way. That is 100% not true. Most people that knew him saw his as full of life, always the life of the party, and fun-loving.

I am not glad or happy that he is gone, but I can sleep at night knowing he is no longer in agonizing psychological pain and he is at peace.

There is already too much pain in this life without people spouting hateful and ignorant things. So, please, if the topic is something you don't know anything about, keep your mouth SHUT! (If I can realize this at 24 years old, certainly real "adults" should already know.)

Also, I wanted to add that while I am not aware of any of this author's work I sympathize with his friends, family, and fans. Please enjoy what he was able to give the world in his life and celebrate his accomplishments instead of focusing on the negative!

By: Lara

Lara — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 03:04:58 +0000

David Foster Wallace was an amazing man. He struggled with the usual darkness that surrounds an artist's mind. But in all that, he was stellar. I was lucky enough to have had him in my life, and spent every other day for a full semester with him. Being lectured for driving from Atlanta, GA to Normal, IL, without stopping, so I could make it to his class on time. And being told, "You're missing your next class, go home, go to sleep." As well as, "Quite trying to write on the level of a professor. Write on your level, as if you're talking to a friend." He also told the entire class, "If you need to talk to me, about an assignment or anything in life, please call me. Here's my number, don't give it out, but I will always be awake for you."

That is not the sign of a selfish man. That's the sign of a selfless man. And when you're like that, sometimes you just give too much.

By: david

david — Sat, 20 Sep 2008 02:58:52 +0000

We don't know that he is at peace. That is an ignorant thing to think. If anything he is still suffering, suffering through you and your incomplete thoughts and emotions regarding his actions. We cannot judge him, we can never ever comprehend him or his journey. We can only work to fathom our own dance on the precipice. We think that somehow this reflects badly on us, those of us who found him there swinging between the ceiling and the floor. He was not an artillery piece, he was not chopping down his own beanstalk. He made a choice to push the chair away from where he had stood a minute before, breathing, beating out frequencies that only he perceived. We need incomplete thoughts to ponder. Half-baked brilliance that did not want to go gently into that good night. It is courageous to look into mediocrity and go forward and find meaning between the gas ovens and the guillotine and complacencies of the penoir's extending wings of darkness. And for the mob, the crowd gathered at the shattered window each one picking up a piece of glass like a piece of the Berlin Wall, brushing up against the cut and wanting to put a little toe across that threshold though which he leaped. Only challenge is you have to trade breath for a look into that uncertain finality.

By: David Foster Wallace, Author | Blog Archive Valley of Life | Online Memorial Blog

Fri, 19 Sep 2008 22:33:57 +0000

[...] Read Todd Leopold, CNN.com Entertainment Producer's tribute to David Foster Wallace. [...]

By: wecannotjudge

wecannotjudge — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 21:45:40 +0000

We should pray fort his man's soul and ask that he is forgiven

By: angry candy

angry candy — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 16:27:12 +0000

Any number of us know depression. I do. It exists in an infinite scope. Its like your best friend,,always with you,,Always. It clouds every thought, every feeling, every moment of your life. This relatively young man, DFW, is now at peace. And it is a peace that many of us yearn.

By: Theresa M

Theresa M — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 21:15:28 +0000

Violet Weed,
Your ignorance really saddens me. How dare you be so judgemental! I lost my brother to suicide 2 yrs ago, he suffered from depression .Depression is a mental illness, it's a disease, as is cancer. My brother left 4 teenage boys. He did not hate them, he loved them, he thought they would be better off with out him. He was an amazing man, that couldn't beat his depression. He tried, he was on meds, he was seeing a professional, he tried so hard. My brother felt helpless,hopeless, and worthless, this is what leads to suicide. it's not about hating someone, it's about ending the pain. Before you open your mouth, and judge, like I said in my brother's eulogy, unless you walk in someone elses shoes, do not judge. I am making sure my brother did not die in vain, by educating people like you, and the stigma of suicide is erased.

RIP DFW, and to his family or friends, please let me know if I can help any. I go to an amazing support group that helps me cope with my loss and pain.

By: mary Kinney

mary Kinney — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 17:41:37 +0000

imagine if you will, ABSOLUTE MENTAL darkness so profound that it leaves you restless, sleepless, angry, lost and desperate. now multiply that times infinity. how would you have coped with suicidal depression?????????

IT IS AN ILLNESS THAT IS COMPLEX AND DIFFICULT TO COMPREHEND. to level any blame or judgement is to add to the illness. DFW probably struggled beyond anyone's imaging-like getting up and wrestling with an invisible 20 ton octopus-again. one day you just give in to the embrace of death hoping ironically that you will arrive at bliss and peace.

By: Ash

Ash — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 01:39:37 +0000

Very sad times for the family indeed: heartfelt thoughts & prayers go out...

@ Violet – pretty much not worthy of attention, but CLEARLY this person has anger and attention issues, to offer such dross. Seriously, take care of your own issues and get some help.

@ ANP – 'little compassion' for people who commit suicide? You've been 'touched by it'? Really?! Sounds like a mere brush or a distant someone of someone, because if you TRULY have been affected by the suicide of a loved one immediate to you, that's the last thing that one would write, so spare me.

@ Tabitha – you too. Truly been affected?

My brother hung himself in our basement when he was 21; I was 19. Selfishness was never the thing that crossed my mind very much about what he did. I acknowledged it, but never dwelled on it. You see, the thing that no one will ever understand, is the absolutely incomprehensible, fathomless, exclusive pain that the heart and mind of a suicide is going through. We did not see it coming; we did not know. We felt we should have; we felt we had failed him, as you go through this too.
NO ONE will never know, so don't even bother with your comments about rage and selfishness. It is sad, period, and the pain of the family is very private.